Odd Thoughts

2003-08-27T00:03:00.000-05:00

The World has changed. I feel it in the water. I feel it in the earth. I smell it in the air. Much that once was is lost, for none now live who remember it. That's right folks, I am leaving Middle Earth (blogger) and setting sail for the Grey Havens (Chattablogs) to be with the elves. I am leaving the Red Book in the care of Jon Amos. You can find me at http://www.chattablogs.com/oddthoughts/.

2003-08-01T15:32:00.000-05:00

No Slums Behind Them Pearly Gates

My good friend Roger Carter forwarded this article to me. This is an actual article from Monroe Louisiana's own daily paper, The News Star:

SHREVEPORT - Greenwood Acres Full Gospel Baptist Church will pay white people to attend services during August to increase the diversity of its congregation. Bishop Fred Caldwell said he will pay $5 per hour for Sunday services and $10 an hour for the Thursday service at the church. The idea came to him during his sermon Sunday. "Our churches are too segregated and the Lord never intended for that to happen. It's time for something radical," he said.
Caldwell is basing the initiative on a parable from Matthew 20:1-16, the story of the workers in the vineyard. A landowner hired men to work in his fields for the day and throughout the day kept seeking more workers. No matter what time they came to work, the workers were all paid the same. Caldwell said he has had several positive responses from the white community so far and expects to put out extra chairs Sunday. One man who called didn't want the money; he just appreciated the invitation.
Church member Criss Williams admits it is a bold step but doesn't have a problem with it. "I don't see it as any different social functions to attract visitors," she said. "Bishop just kind of cut to the chase and went to the money."
To get their money, white visitors will have to register when they attend. Caldwell will pay them from his pocket and enlist the help of the congregation if needed. "I just want the kingdom of God to look like it's supposed to," he said. "There ain't going to be ghettos in heaven."

I wanted to verify this so I did a search through google and found that both CNN and ABC have reported this story too.

2003-07-29T17:06:00.000-05:00

Odd Thoughts on the Billboard Charts

Today I thought I'd take a look at the Billboard web site and see what sort of things those crazy kids listen to these days. I haven't listened to the radio in a while and I'm pretty much stuck in a musical rut, which I don't mind. I still listen to new music, it's just new music from the old bands I've always liked. Anyway, I have to admit that I am astounded at what I see on the charts. I figured when I did this I'd at least have to read the lyrics of some of these songs to make fun of them, but I don't even have to do that. Of the top 10 songs, only two (Unwell by Matchbox 20 and Miss Independent by Kelly Clarkson) are free from silly/slangy spelling in the titles or the name of the artist. The other eight spots are done by folks like Beyonce featuring Jay-Z, Chingy, 50 Cent (twice), Lumidee, Ginuwine, and Uncle Kracker singing songs with titles like Rock Wit U, Right Thurr, and P.I.M.P. A name like 50 Cent (not cents, mind you) tells me all I need to know about that performer. Jay-Z, Uncle Kracker, and Ginuwine all fall into the category of silly spelling. I don't mind the sound of Uncle Kracker, but I just can't get past that "K." And Ginuwine? Is that some kind heavy-duty daiquiri? And then there's Chingy and Lumidee. Now that I think about it though, Chingy Lumidee Booth wouldn't be a bad name if we have another daughter. I almost wish I could go back and use it now, but I guess it's too late. But be warned: Amy and I will be very upset if any of you folks out there steal Chingy Lumidee from us before we get to use it.

2003-07-28T19:35:00.000-05:00

Mariner Report

The Mariners are still playing poorly, and the month longs slump is really starting to show itself in the standings. Our lead over the A's is only 3. I've been told by readers of this report that I should worry about the season - I should worry about the post-season. Well, at the rate we're going, there won't be a post-season. The M's have wasted many opportunities to pull away from the A's, and there won't be a wildcard shot. The Redsox are playing quite well thses days; a division title is the only shot. In my opinion, the M's need two things: 1) bullpen help and 2) a big bat in the middle of the line up. The first need will be taken care of when Kazuhiro Sasaki comes back and the other guys in the pen can go back to their normal roles. The second need is a bit more difficult. Obviously it would have to involve a trade, and I think we afford to do it. I don't really know who we should go get, but I think Freddy Garcia will be the guy we give to get him. Gracia has been the least consistent pitcher on the staff, but he's young enough and has had enough past success that he still has value around the league. Furthermore, he's a free agent next year, and clearly not the M's long term plans. Otherwise, why would we have only given him a a 1-year deal? The rest of the rotation is strong, and Rafael Soriano can be moved into the rotation to take Garcia's spot. I noticed that Melvin let Soriano go 4 innings last Friday against Texas. Why would a manager use his bullpen like that unless he was grooming a guy to be a starter? Now, the question that remains is who to get. Well, given the needs of the team, it would have to be a left fielder or a third baseman. If we limit ourselves to those two positions and assume that all the teams below .500 are sellers, then here's the list of possibilities: Jeff Conine (BAL, OF-1B), Dmitri Young (DET, OF-3B-1B), Geoff Jenkins (MIL, OF), Rondell White (SD, OF), Ryan Klesko (SD, OF-1B), Raul Mondesi (NYY, OF), and J.D. Drew (STL, OF). If I had a choice out of this group, believe it or not, I take Dmitri Young. His stats look good, but they're even better when you consider he doing it for Detroit, in a giant ballpark, with no line up protection. He plays third well enough to keep Randy Winn in the outfield, he is a career .294 hitter, and he hits from both sides of the plate. However, I haven't heard anything about the Tigers looking to part with him, and I don't know what his contract status is. The second best idea is Drew. The Cardinals have acknowledged wanting, or needing, to trade him for a starting pitcher. We have a starting pitcher to give up. The specualation could go on and on, but let's hope something happens this week, instead of just watch the A's role past us this August like the did last August. Hopefully our general manager can shake off the nick-name "Stand Pat" Gillick.

Mariner of the Week: This will actually be the Mariner of the Last 10 Days. My choice is Ryan Franklin. Franklin has been the hard-luck pitcher on the team this year, but he really stepped up big against the A's last Wednesday. Franklin fired a two-hit shutout - the first of his career. Since the All-Star break Franklin is 1-0 in 2 starts, allowing only 3 runs in 16 innings (1.69 ERA), and 6 strikeouts. He's throwing for us tonight against the Rangers.

2003-07-27T16:31:00.000-05:00

Hall of Fame

Gary Carter and Eddie Murray were officially inducted into the Baseball Hall of Fame today. Carter, who began his career as a member of the Montreal Expos in 1974, was one of my first baseball heroes when he starred for the Mets in the mid and late 80’s. Carter was one of the greatest catchers of all-time and truly deserves this honor. In addition to his twelve years in Montreal and five years in New York, Carter spent one season as a Giant and one as a Dodger. Carter will wear an Expos cap on his plaque; he is the only Montreal representative in the Hall of Fame. Career Highlights: 11 time All-Star, 3 time gold glove winner, 2 time All-Star game MVP (1981, 1984), 4 top ten MVP finishes including 2nd in 1980, Led NL in RBI in 1984 (106), 324 career home runs (3rd all-time as a catcher), 1225 RBI, 2,092 hits, .262 average. Murray came up with the Baltimore Orioles in 1977 and made an immediate impact, winning the AL Rookie of the Year Award. Murray was never the very best player in the game, and except for a shared lead in the strike-shortened 1981 season, never led his league in any statistical category. He was, however, very consistent, hitting 20+ homers in 16 of 21 seasons. Murray spent twelve years in Baltimore, three as a Dodger, two as a Met, three as an Indian, and partial seasons as an Angel, back with the Orioles, and back with the Dodgers. He will wear an O’s cap in the Hall. Career Highlights: 8 time All-Star, 1977 AL Rookie of the Year, 3 time gold glove winner, 8 top ten MVP finishes (2nd in 1982 and 1983), 6th all-time in games and at bats (3,026 & 11,336), 12th in hits (3,255), 8th in total bases (5,397), 17th in doubles (560), 19th in home runs (504), and 8th in RBI (1,917).

2003-07-14T16:36:00.000-05:00

Name Game

Since I read Bart's post about naming, I've spent some time thinking about the sorts of reasons people have for naming their children. I came up with 4 reasons (in no particular order): sound, meaning, ethnicity, history (whether familial or broader historical context). Obviously in America the sound of a name takes precedent in most cases. I can't deny that sound was the primary reason for the name we chose. Most of the reformed/intellectual sorts tend to argue for meaning and history as the best reasons for choosing a name, but I've been wondering if that position is missing something. My question is mostly directed toward the linguist sorts among us (Courtney Huntington, Jeremy Wilkins, Doug Jones, Matt Greydanus), but everyone should feel free to give their two cents. Anyway, here's the question: what role should the sound of the words have in child naming? It seems that J.R.R. Tolkien put a lot of emphasis on sound when he created his various languages, and the same reformed/intellectual types referred to above love to talk about sound in poetry and the way certain words fit together.

2003-07-14T00:38:00.000-05:00

Mariner Report

The M's were still unable to climb above .500 for the week, as we have shown ourselves to be excellent when it comes to loosing series' to loosing teams (this week it was Baltimore). The bullpen is still my biggest complaint. However, we have a little break to look forward to and a schedule that looks favorable for the rest of the month. After the break, we have three against Kansas City, a team that we've been able to handle pretty well so far this year. Brett Boone will be representing us in the Home Run Derby tomorrow. Boone appeared in one Derby before (2001) and failed to get out of the first round. I'll be rooting for him, but he is far from being the favorite. With a 3 for 4 day, Ichiro has taken his rightful spot atop the AL batting average chart (.352). Let's hope that the second half goes better for us than it did last year.

Mariner of the Week: In a surprise turn, I’m going with Willie Bloomquist based on the strength of one game. Willie hit his first major league home run on Sunday with a grand slam in the first inning. He also made a spectacular defensive play at third base. It was a definite Web Gem. He went 2 for 5 on the day with 6 RBI’s. For the week he went 5 for 10 (he hit the cycle during the week) with 7 RBI’s.

2003-07-14T00:18:00.000-05:00

MLB Report

I've covered and complained about all-stars, I've made a few observations about the first half, so there's only a few items remaining before we head into the all-star break. Has anybody noticed how hot Sammy Sosa has been lately? For a guy that has missed about 25 games this season, his season numbers are not far off from where they should be (18, 50, .310). In the last three weeks he's been even better (11, 20, .338). Barry Bonds made it to 30 home runs before the break, giving him 643 career, just 17 short of Willie Mays for third on the all-time list. I expect he'll do it this year. Assuming he finishes the year with 55 (668), he'll be just 46 away from passing Babe Ruth (713) - 88 away from passing Hank Aaron (755). He may not be the most valuable player in the game (in terms of a paycheck), but he is still the most feared hitter in the game. It seems safe to say that when someone asked who the greatest player of all time is, Bonds has to be in the discussion. Blue Jays star Carlos Delgado enters the break with 97 RBIs. He's on pace for 167 for the year. That would tie him with Joe DiMaggio's 1937 total at #11. Only two players in recent memory have driven in 160 (Sosa, 160, 2001 & Manny Ramirez 165, 1999). Juan Pierre of the Marlins has already stolen 44 bases. So he's on pace for 80+, which is not record setting, but no player has stolen 80 or more since 1988 (Vince Coleman, 81 & Rickey Henderson, 93). Of course John Smoltz and Eric Gagne are both on pace to set the single-season saves record (57, Bobby Thigpen, 1990). Smolt is already #2 on that list with 55 saves last year. Ichiro is leading the majors with 137 hits and is on pace for 239. That would give him 689 hits in his first 3 seasons. This is a hard record to research, but I did my best. I looked through the top 100 on the all-time hit list. The only person even close in his first three seasons is Lloyd Waner who had 678 hits from 1927-29. I realized how great a feat that was when I looked through the same list to find players who could exceed that hit total in any three consecutive seasons in their career. I found only two: 703, Rogers Hornsby and 719 George Sisler. Both did it in the years 1920-22 and both hit over .400 at least once in that span (Hornsby .401 in 1922, Sisler .407 in 1920 and .420 in 1922). Based on some rough projections, Ichiro would need 270 hits to pass Sisler's total for a three-year span. That would smash the single-season hit mark also held by Sisler (257 in 1920). Based on the projection of Ichiro's at bat per game ratio, 270 hits would give him a .397 batting average. I suppose we can hope. The biggest projection questions for this season involve Albert Pujols. There are two questions: 1) Can he hit .400? 2)Can he win the Triple Crown? He can't hit .400. He's just not the right type to do it. He's right handed, not especially quick, gets too many walks, and opposing teams want to pitch around him. (Ichiro seems to be thge most likely candidate of current MLB players to pull off the feat - he's the opposite of all my objections about Pujols - but it still seems unlikely to me that anybody will do it again, including Ichiro.) Pujols could, however, win the Triple Crown. He's running away with the batting title, 4th in home runs, and second in RBIs. Of the players ahead of him in home runs, only Bonds is proven home run hitter, and pitchers pitch around him more than any other player in the game, which drives his home run totals down, and the other two guys (Jim Edmonds and Mike Lowell) both have good pop, but neither has been a perenial slugger. Pujols has better guys batting in front of him than Preston Wilson, who is currently ahead of Pujols in RBI's. I'm not making a promise that Pujols will pull it off, but I think he has the ability to do it, and I'm rooting for him to pull it off.

2003-07-10T16:58:00.000-05:00

Shasta: 9/1/89 - 7/10/03

If you’ve seen verbingnouns today, then you're aware of our family loss. After Dad called to tell me Shasta died I spent some time this afternoon thinking about the nature of the relationship between people and pets (particularly dogs). Dogs are a special gift from God for man. Aside from the many useful things dogs have done over the years, they also provide a simple joy just to be around (at least good dogs). Dad said it best in his comment on Christin's post titled Shasta:

Your mom and I feel very sad today. We were sad to see her suffer and sad to see her go. We cried, but we also knew it was time.
As a part of our family, Shasta received the benefits of the covenant household -- since I belong to God so do the things I possess – children, land, money and animals -- they are extensions of me -- it is my children, my land, my money and my animals.
Animals are blessings at many levels, but pets are special because they bring us joy, entertainment, companionship, comfort and more. It seems odd to say of an animal, “she has her own personality,” (since she is not really a person), but what else do you call it? Your dog treats you like you’re a god; it’s close to worship. No matter how the world has treated you that day, your dog still loves you and thrills at your presence. A pat on the head, a scratch on the belly, a toss of the ball, or a chase around the yard is all it takes to give them pure delight. In many ways they remind us of what’s important. (Who doesn’t want a pat on the head -- or somewhere -- from time-to-time?)
Shasta was playful, affectionate, occasionally naughty, but always loyal and a blessing to the Booth household. She was a gift from God. “The Lord gives and the Lord takes away. Blessed be the name of the Lord.” We will miss her.

2003-07-09T15:09:00.000-05:00

Our Outrageous Government Strikes Again

Today I went to see one of my best and nicest customers. She is in her mid to late sixties, and everytime I come she is keeping her four grandchildren. Today when I arrived I noticed that the kids weren't there, so I asked about them. She said that because her daughter was paying her to keep the kids ($60 a week) the state of Louisiana would not allow her to watch the kids unless she successfully completed a CPR training course. I have no speech.

2003-07-07T00:36:00.000-05:00

Perhaps one of the most ridiculous things to do these days is to have bad art or a silly bumper sticker on your car, but nothing says “I’m an idiot with a stupid opinion” like a window sticker of Calvin peeing on something. Do people really feel this strongly about a choice between Chevy, Dodge, and Ford? I’ve even seen Toyota as one of the unfortunate recipients of Calvin’s uncontrollable angst. Today I saw him relieving himself on Osama bin Laden. I would do this myself, but I think I would appreciate a sticker of Calvin peeing on Calvin peeing.

2003-07-07T00:33:00.000-05:00

Out of the Loop

I struggle and struggle each week to come up with something to post in addition to the baseball stuff so that those of you who don't care about MLB will have something to read and comment on too. I suppose I could do better if I had time to look at the blogs the rest of you have. I just found out tonight that Courtney and Lisa have a blog when I was looking at Jon's long list of links. I just don't get around on the blogs enough. Maybe I should rename this place as Ordinary Thoughts. I could go for cheap pop by getting Josh Melton all stired up or complaining about race issues, but I don't really want to go that route. On the other hand, no is news, I've come to believe, is generally good news. Maybe some of you folks out there can give me a topic.

2003-07-06T23:49:00.000-05:00

Mariner Report

I thoroughly enjoyed Saturday’s game in Arlington, as I had the privilege of seeing our boys beat the Rangers in 10 innings. The pitching was very good. Moyer pitched well, but got a no-decision and Rhodes, Nelson, Soriano (who won the game), and Hasegawa (who saved the game) all looked sharp. The bats were a bit slow, but we managed to score enough without it. Overall though, we stink. A 3 and 4 showing this week makes us 13 and 13 over the last four weeks. Nevertheless, we are still the best team in baseball with a half game edge on the Braves. Ordinarily, I would be looking forward to next week’s match-ups with 3 against Baltimore and 3 against Tampa Bay, but the way we’ve been playing, I’m sure we’ll find a way to loose at least one of those series. On a note of minor interest, Friday’s game will be Lou Piniella’s first time back in Seattle. I expect the fans will give him a tremendous ovation. Although our record has not been good of late, Freddie Garcia was named the AL pitcher of the month for June, and we went the entire month without giving up an unearned run. Ichiro and Edgar Martinez were both voted to start in the All-Star game, and not surprisingly, Jamie Moyer and Brett Boone were named as reserves. Gil Meche got the cold shoulder, but I am just elated that Shigetoshi Hasegawa made the team. I’ve been pleased over the past few years that top notch middle relievers have been chosen for the All-Star team, Hasegawa definitely fits the bill. (Although Arthur Rhodes was severely snubbed for this honor in 2001 and 2002.) I do my best to give praise to worthy Mariners, but even I have failed to give the proper credit to Hasegawa. He has 44.1 innings pitched (more than any other M’s reliever), a 1-0 record, 3 for 3 in save opportunities, and a microscopic 0.81 ERA. Thanks, Shigi. We couldn’t have done it without you.

Mariner of the Week: I got to give this weeks MOW to Jamie Moyer. After a few down starts and poor run support, Moyer bounced back and got some run support this week, winning 1 and getting a no-decision in another. In all he pitched 14 innings, gave up 3 runs (1.93), and struck out 5. Moyer ended his week by being named to his first All-Star team in his 17th season.

2003-07-06T23:16:00.000-05:00

MLB Report

There is not much to report this week besides the All-Star selections. So let me give you The Real Game of the Week: Giants @ Diamondbacks, and move straight to the mystery that is the All-Star teams. Click to see the NL team or the AL team. Every year there are surprising selections by fans and managers as well as significant snubs. The snubs are typically caused by bad voting on the part of the fans, but this year I think the fans have done fairly well. I have no disputes with the NL starters and in the AL I affirm six choices, am not convinced of two (Hideki Matsui over several other deserving candidates and Alfonso Soriano over Bret Boone), and strongly deny one (Troy Glaus over Hank Blalock). I don’t dispute any of the reserves, but I need to qualify that statement. There might be some players left off the team that deserve to be there over another player who is there. But all the players that are going are having All-Star caliber seasons. On the NL squad I was surprised by these selections: Mike Williams (PIT), Paul Lo Duca (LAD), and Rondell White (SDP). Notable NL snubs: Hideo Nomo (LAD), Octavio Dotel (HOU), Corey Patterson (CHC), Juan Pierre (FLA). I was happy to see Sammy Sosa and Ivan Rodriguez (two players I generally like) fail in the vote and then fail to be selected as a reserve; they just don’t deserve it. On the AL team I was surprised by the selections of Barry Zito (OAK), Lance Carter (TBD), Shigetoshi Hasegawa (SEA), and Carl Everett (CHW/TEX). Notable AL snubs: Gil Meche (SEA), Sidney Ponson (BAL), Roger Clemens (NYY – this is his last year, for crying out loud! I hate the Yankees, but the guy is a baseball legend, and he has pitched well enough to deserve a spot.), Aubrey Huff (TBD). Each team will have one more player who will be elected by the fans. This is a really silly idea, but if you want to vote you can do it at MLB.com. I am voting for Geoff Jenkins and Eric Byrnes, but Jason Giambi and Benito Santiago will probably win.

2003-06-29T22:16:00.000-05:00

Praise God for his Promises to Us

Today Sophie was baptized into God’s covenant. Amy and I are ecstatic that God gave Sophie to us and that He has made such glorious promises to her. We were also very happy that this special event was witnessed by all our friends at Auburn Avenue as well as her Uncle Pat and Aunt Shannon, who traveled from Baton Rouge and her Great Grand parents Melinda Trisler and Bob and Lucille Booth. Sophie had the distinct privilege of being baptized by her papa (my father) in a gown made by her gran (my mother). Please pray for us as we attempt to bring Sophie up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord

2003-06-29T21:59:00.000-05:00

Our Household has Increased by One

Friday afternoon we got our latest addition to the household. We call him Neo. Yes it has to do with the Matrix guy. We got him from my uncle, who is very much into the Matrix. In fact, just about any conversation you have with him will be peppered with references to the movie. Neo is a registered Border Collie, born just five minutes after Sophie. We happy to have him and we hope he serves us well.

2003-06-29T21:50:00.000-05:00

Mariner Report

Wow, we stink; 3 and 3 again. That makes us a lousy 10 and 9 in the last three weeks which is hardly the pace of a division champion. Nevertheless we managed to cling to our lead over the Braves and extend our lead by one game over the A’s. It’s bad when you’re happy to be done with the Padres and move on to the A’s. The Padres beat us in another series, taking 2 of 3. . . If not for Arthur Rhodes and Jeff Nelson giving grand slams to Rondell White, we would have won two more games against them, but the bullpen seems to be breaking down, and the loss of Kazuhiro Sasaki seems to be greater every day. Maybe Shigetosi Hasagawa should be closing the games. Maybe our bullpen is still really good, but the Padres (at least Rondell White) just have our number. Anyway, Nelson and Rhodes need to get things together. The way they’ve been going they’re making one of our biggest strengths a weakness. . . Next week we have 4 against the A’s and 3 against the Rangers. I’d be happy with a split against the A’s, but we have to sweep the Rangers. We definitely have to beat the Rangers Saturday night, as I (along with my dad and Robbie) will be in attendance at The Ballpark in Arlington as Jamie Moyer seeks his (hopefully) 12th win. Moyer and Gil Meche will be the double duty pitchers this week. . . On a milestone note, Edgar Martinez became the Mariner’s all-time RBI leader (1,155) with a two run homer on Friday (Ken Griffey Jr. was the former leader).

Mariner of the Week: I have to go with Freddy Garcia this week. Garcia would have won 2 games this week had Rhodes not blown the game in the 9th. Freddy went 1-0 in 2 starts, with 12.2 innings and a 2.84 ERA.

2003-06-29T20:38:00.000-05:00

MLB Report

I have just a few items this week, before I get to the mid-season report. Ranger’s outfielder Juan Gonzalez exercised his no-trade clause this week, declining a trade to the Montreal Expos. I guess this is just another example of how messed up Juan’s priorities are. It seems he’d rather keep stinking it up for what seems to be the always cellar-dwelling Rangers, rather than go to Montreal where he has a playoff shot and a chance to play on a team that has some pitching. Gonzalez has been a largely selfish player anyway only playing well in contract years (this is one) . . . Oakland upstart Eric Byrnes hit for cycle today and seems to be one of the few A’s hitting well. . . The Red Sox plated 10 players before recording an out in the 1st inning against the Marlins. They went on to score 14 in the first and another 11 during the rest of the game giving them 25 for the day. Leadoff hitter Johnny Damon went 3 for 3 in the 1st inning. . . The Real Game of the Week: Boston Red Sox @ New York Yankees.

We are now at the halfway point for the 2003 MLB season (most teams have played 80 games, so we’re close enough). If the Playoffs started today, I would be 6 for 8 in my playoff predictions from the beginning of the season. I have been correct on the Yankees, Red Sox (wildcard), Twins (although they are tied with the Royals), Mariners, Braves, and Giants. I was wrong on the NL Central where I predicted the Astros would be leading that division and the Cardinals would be the wildcard. Instead. The Phillies are the wildcard leaders, and the Astros are 3 games behind the Cardinals with the Cubs between them.
Biggest Surprise Team (NL): Montreal Expos. The Expos are 9 games over .500 and just a half-game behind the Phillies for the wildcard lead, and they’ve done with Vladamir Guerrero on the shelf for the past three weeks. Playoff chances: 50/50
Biggest Surprise Team (AL): Kansas City Royals. After a super hot start (11-0), and a long slump, the Royals have pulled even the favored Minnesota Twins in the AL Central. Playoff chances: Unlikely
Biggest Surprise Player (NL): Curt Schilling, Randy Johnson, Greg Maddux, Tom Glavine, and Kevin Brown. The first four players are supposed to be the best in the NL and Brown is supposed to be washed up. The statistics show the opposite. Kudos to Mike Lowell.
Biggest Surprise Player (AL): Melvin Mora. What’s wrong this list of AL slugging percentage leaders? Carlos Delgado (.653), Brett Boone (.610), Garrett Anderson (.594), Nomar Garciaparra (.585), Melvin Mora (.581). Kudos to Eric Byrnes.
Comeback Player (NL): Kevin Brown
Comeback Player (AL): Carl Everett
Best hitting Team (all): Boston Red Sox (.300 team avg., MLB avg. .265 – worst: Tigers, .225)
Best Pitching Team (all): Los Angeles Dodgers (2.82 team ERA, MLB avg. 4.44 – worst: Rangers 6.16)
Best Fielding Team (all): Seattle Mariners (28 team errors, MLB avg. 53.23 – worst: Reds, 74)
Rookie of the Year (NL): Dontrelle Willis
Rookie of the Year (AL): Rocco Baldelli. Sorry, Hideki Matsui.
Cy Young (NL): 1) Kevin Brown, 2) Mark Prior, 3) Eric Gagne, 4) Woody Williams, 5) Hideo Nomo
Cy Young (AL): 1) Roy Halladay, 2) Esteban Loaiza, 3) Jamie Moyer, 4) Mark Mulder, 5) Mike Mussina
MVP (NL): 1) Albert Pujols, 2) Gary Sheffield, 3) Jim Edmonds, 4) Mike Lowell 5) Barry Bonds
MVP (AL): 1) Carlos Delgado, 2) Bret Boone, 3) Nomar Garciaparra, 4) Ichiro, 5) Garrett Anderson

2003-06-23T20:10:00.000-05:00

Google Yourself

I was trying to find something interesting to post, so I just typed "Aaron Booth" in the search field on Google and it turns out that I'm a Canadian musician trying to make a name for myself. Also at aaronboothmusic I found out that I am "a melodic writer with a love for penning hooks that hang on for dear life. His [my] songs are hopeful, wistful, poetic and often bittersweet broadcasts describing the tension and release of an emotional landscape "somewhere in between." How about that?

I gues my sister Christin is the only Christin Booth in the world. The first 9 hits on that search turned up verbingnouns, Zoe'z Place, Beautiful Feet, Odd Thoughts, and New St. Andrews. . . Much like Christin, ride across the sky . . . is the first listing for Deacon James. Micah Lewis, Remy Wilkins, Toby Sumpter, and Shannon Trisler all produce similar results relating to their own blogs or blogs within our circle. . . My wife Amy is also a fantasy artist (runs in the family). You can see her work here. . . James Marsalis just draws a bunch of sites about the famous Marsalises of Jazz. . . However, according to Blue Domeour friend Jon Amosis a wheel-chair bound athlete that "set a wheelchair world altitude record of 16,040ft on Africa's highest mountain - Mount Kilimanjaro. Jon Amos is now undertaking his next venture, which is called 'Man of Steel' Trans-Australia challenge. This is to be an hand cycling endurance 'trek' of 2,020 miles through the heart of Australia during which comparative studies will take place to see what physiological and psychological differences, if any, there are between the Spinal cord injured athlete and the able-bodied." Jon you're an encouragement to us all. . . Josh Melton plays football for the University of Arkansas. He even has his picture here. . . Unfortunately, Robbie McBroom died in 1997. I'm not sure of the cause of death, Jeff Simmons and Larry Helton left a gift of rememberance at Voices of Hope. . . Of all the seraches I've done though, this one takes the cake, and I mean the whole freakin' cake! Matt Greydanus told me a story about him staring in a film called Mousie when he was 12 or 13 and it was shown on A&E in 1986. Anyway, there's a website for it complete with pictures of Matt in his starring role and directions on buying the film. Check it out.

2003-06-23T20:07:00.000-05:00

AL All-Stars

The starters would be Jorge Posada (C - NYY), Carlos Delgado (1B - TOR), Alfonso Soriano (2B - NYY), Alex Rodriguez (SS - TEX), Troy Glaus (3B - ANA), Ichiro (OF - SEA), Manny Ramirez (OF - BOS), Torii Hunter (OF - MIN), and Edgar Martinez (DH - SEA). That leaves room for 12 pitchers and 11 position players. The pitchers would be Roy Halladay (TOR - game starter), Jamie Moyer (SEA), Esteban Loaiza (CHW), Mark Mulder (OAK), Mike Mussina (NYY), Corey Lidle (TOR), Roger Clemens (NYY), Gil Meche (SEA), Sidney Ponson (BAL), Chris Donnelly (ANA), Keith Foulke (OAK), and Eddie Guardado (MIN). That gives us four teams without representation, so we'll take Mike Sweeney (KCR), Dmitri Young (DET), Milton Bradley (CLE), and Aubrey Huff (TBD). That leaves seven spots open and we still need back ups for catcher, 2nd base, and short stop. A.J. Peirzynski is the catcher. 2nd and short are not hard choices at all: Brett Boone and Nomar Garciaparra. That leaves four spots with no restrictions on selection. So we'll take Garrett Anderson, Vernon Wells, Rafael Palmeiro, and Melvin Mora (as a short stop). Sorry Rocco Baldelli, Juan Gonzalez, Carl Everett, C.C. Sabathia, and Jay Gibbons.

2003-06-23T14:40:00.000-05:00

I'm not really one to blog about the weather, but sheesh it's hot. The official West Monroe temperature is 103 with a heat index of 112. It's killing me. It's so hot the humidity is actually going down.

2003-06-23T08:34:00.000-05:00

Mariner Report

Our record does not show how poorly we've really been playing. We're 7-6 in the last two weeks (4-3 this week), and somehow we've managed to hang on to the best record in the game although we lost two games to the A's this week (7.5 to 5.5). Overall the pitching has been fine, with the exception of Jeff Nelson's loss the other night. Even that is forgivable though. But the hitting has got to come back. Ichiro keeps hitting well and Boone is doing okay. but after those two everybody could stand to step it up a notch or two. This week's schedule is the same as the last except we only play 3 against the Angels and we play the Padres at home. Our days of loosing Edgar because of the lack of DH are over, unless we go to the World Series, but we can worry about that later. Even when Edgar is not hitting he makes a big impact in the lineup and it will be good to have him back on a full time basis this week. Kazuhiro Sasaki's injury is more serious than originally thought. There is no time table on his return, but we can survive without him.

Mariner of the Week: Joel Pineiro won two games, but Ichiro continues to be red hot. He has an active 18-game hitting streak, still leads the majors with 109 hits, and is just five points off the batting lead with a .356 average. This week Ichiro went 15 for 29 with two home runs (in one game). He was on base 16 times during the week, but scored only six times, which is indicative of the Mariner's hitting woes these days. Nevertheless, our whole offense starts with "The Samurai of Slap" and he's been more than doing his part.

2003-06-23T08:13:00.000-05:00

MLB Report

Roy Halladay of the upstart Toronto Blue Jays won his 11th consecutive start. It's the longest such streak in the majors in 6 years. Another hot young pitcher is Florida's Dontrelle Willis who followed his one-hit outing against the Mets with another shutout against the Devil Rays. Willis is 7-1 on the season and his animated style is reminiscent of Mark "The Bird" Fidrych and "The Mad Hungarian" Al Hrobosky (both pitched in the 70's). If you have the chance, Willis is definitely worth watching. The first of the "Geographic Rival" Weekends with mixed results. The trouble is there was only series that had any real draw to it (Giants vs. A's). The rest were mostly a good team against a bad team or two bad teams. I ranted a bit last week about Fox choosing the Yanks and Cards over the Mariner's and Braves for there game of the week and I'd like to extend that discussion a bit. So if a Fox or ESPN executive happens to read this, listen up. Yankees/Mets, White Sox/Cubs: we don't care. Dodgers/Angels: we mostly don't care. Believe it or not, there are people who do not live in New York, Chicago, or L.A. The Dodgers/Angels series had a limited national appeal because the Dodgers are playing well and the Angels are the defending champs, although they are not playing particularly well. But the other two series pits one good team (Yankees, Cubs) against really bad teams (Mets, White Sox) We've seen these series before, and they're just not that interesting outside their particular markets. The Mets/Yankees didn't even feature the Clemens/Piazza matchup as Clemens wasn't scheduled to pitch and Piazza's on the DL. Nevertheless, two of the three games from each of these series were nationally televised. The Blue Jays/Expos is a better series for crying out loud. At least those two teams both have post season hopes. I realize one could argue that despite their position in the standings, the Yankees, Cubs, Dodgers, and sometimes Red Sox and Cardinals get more national games because they're more popular. I can grant that, but you can fix that. Show the Mariners. Show the A's. Show the Astros. These are three teams that are doing well (and have done so for the last five years). How can the baseball fans across the country become fans of teams like these and gain a national following unless you put them on TV sometimes? I'm a Mariner fan, but I'm not arguing that the M's/Padres series should have been the game of the week. It shouldn't be either one. It should have been the A's/Giants because it was two good teams playing a series that had meaning as each team needs every win to maintain or gain on their current positions. With that in mind - I want to introduce a new weekly feature to the MLB Report: The Real Game of the Week. This way if you turn on Fox on Saturday to be propogated by the Yankees and the like, you'll know that there is another game out there with more meaning and better matchups. Sometimes the popular teams will be The Real Game of the Week, and that's okay. Who can deny that Yankees/Red Sox (given their current position in the AL East) would be the game with the most national appeal? So the first ever Real Game of the Week is Oakland @ San Fransisco. The schedule next weekend is largely the same as last weekend, so the decision is really a no-brainer.

It seems this report has spilled into a second paragraph, and here are my reasons. We're approaching the halfway mar for the season (I believe the end of next week), the All-Star game is coming up, and the Trading Deadline follows shortly after that. As a result there will lots of things to cover in July and I need to get a head start. Next week I want to look at projected award winners and play "If the Playoffs Started Today" in addition to the fact that the All-Star starters should be named by then. So this week I want to make predictions about who will be an All-Star and who deserves to be an All-Star. The Commisioner's Office expanded the All-Star roster from 30 to 32 to give each team more pitchers and try to avoid the tie that happened last year. The other stipulation, in case you didn't know, is that every team must be represented, which results in some undeserving selections and some snubs. I doubt there will be any change in the current voting, so we'll assume that the current vote leaders will get to start. In the NL that would be Ivan Rodriguez (C - FLA), Jeff Bagwell (1B - HOU), Jeff Kent (2B - HOU), Edgar Renteria (SS - STL), Scott Rolen (3B - STL), Barry Bonds (OF - SF), Sammy Sosa (OF - CHC), and Gary Sheffield (OF - ATL). I can accept all of these choices but one: There's no way Sosa deserves to start over Albert Pujols. There is no case for that whatsoever. I suppose there will be 12 more position players and 12 pitchers. The pitchers should be: Kevin Brown (LAD - game starter), Woody Williams (STL), Mark Prior (CHC), Kevin Millwood (PHI) Al Leiter (NYM - we have to pick a Met), Russ Ortiz (ATL), Hideo Nomo (LAD), Dontrell Willis (FLA), Octavio Dotel (HOU), Billy Wagner (HOU), John Smoltz (ATL), and Eric Gagne (LAD). That leaves 12 position players and 7 NL teams not currently represented, so let's knock those out. The only real option from the Diamondbacks is Luis Gonzalez. As a Padre, we take 2B Mark Loretta, and from Colorado we take Todd Helton. The Reds have to send Aaron Boone to play 3B, Kenny Lofton comes from Pittsburg, and Richie Sexson comes from the Brewers. This leaves only the Expos who will be represented by Orlando Cabrerra at SS. That leaves 6 more roster spots for players who actually deserve it. Obviously we add Pujols and that leaves five. Given what we have so far, we have a back up at every position except catcher and Javy Lopez is the clear choice; we also take Marcus Giles from Atlanta. Next we take Mike Lowell (3B) from Florida. The last two spots go to Preston Wilson of Colorado and Rafael Furcal of Atlanta. Sorry: Cory Patterson, Austin Kearns, Andruw Jones, Paul Lo Duca, and Jim Edmonds. Albert Pujols, if not elected, will start as the DH since the game is held in an AL park. AL All-stars reviewed later this week.

2003-06-19T23:35:00.000-05:00

Finally

I was just ecstatic when I read this report from USA Today. Now maybe we can get both sides of the news.

Al Gore is apparently looking to return to his media career roots. The former Democratic vice president has been courting Hollywood figures and wealthy investors to help him build a liberal cable television network, Time magazine reported on its Web site Wednesday. Gore, who has decided against running for president in 2004, envisions an outlet that could compete against such popular conservative voices as Rush Limbaugh, Bill O'Reilly and the Fox News Channel. Before running for Congress in 1976, Gore was a newspaper reporter for The (Nashville) Tennessean.

2003-06-19T23:32:00.000-05:00

There Is Such a Thing as a Respectable Yankee

You should all know by now that I hate the Yankees. From time to time though, they have some real class-act ball players on the team, and in my opinion there is cureently none finer than Bernie Williams. But aside from being a great player and a gentleman he is also an accomplished classical guitarist. His first CD will be released in abaout a month. Williams wrote seven of the eleven songs on the disc which also includes a cover of Billy Joel's "And So it Goes" and the Kansas classic "Dust in the Wind." I don't really like the description of his style as given by his producer's website: ". . . [Williams] has composed a refreshing blend of highly melodic, contemporary and Latin-flavored jazz selections with an undeniably soulful delivery." Despite that silly description, his playing ability has been praised by Paul Simon and Paul McCartney and one track on the disc features an accompaniment from Bela Fleck. I'll definitely be interested in giving this disc a listen.

2003-06-19T23:02:00.000-05:00

Larry Doby, 1923-2003

Larry Doby, the second black player in Major League Baseball (first AL player), died Wednesday evening. Before tonight, that is about all I could have told you about his career. Before sharing some of the fruits of my research I have to say that he must have been an exceptional man of character to be chosen as one of the first black players. Given the general unfair treatment, name calling, and death threats that the early blacks received only the most cool headed, patient, and respectful players were chosen, and Doby must have been exceptional among his peers. Doby finished second in AL MVP voting in 1954 with 32 home runs and 126 RBI's which led the league in both categories. In a career that spanned from 1947 to 1959 Dody played 1,553 games (mostly in the outfield) with 1,515 hits, 253 home runs, 970 RBI's, and .273 batting average. Doby was inducted to the Hall of Fame in 1998. His Hall of Fame plaque reads:

Exceptional athletic prowess and a staunch constitution led to a successful playing career after integrating the American League in 1947. A seven-time All-Star who batted .283 with 253 home runs and 970 RBI in 13 Major League seasons. The power-hitting center fielder paced the A.L. in home runs twice and collected 100 RBI five times, while leading the Indians to pennants in 1948 and 1954. Appointed manager of the White Sox in 1978, the second African-American to lead a Major League club. Played four seasons with Newark in the Negro National League. Following player career worked as a scout and Major League Baseball executive.

2003-06-16T08:34:00.000-05:00

Mariner Report

3 and 3 is tough week, but we came out it not much worse than we started. We're still tied with the Braves for the best record in the game and we lost only one game of our lead over the A's (from 8 to 7). The Expos really made a big impression on me. They're like the poor man's Mariners. The play a similar style and really play hard for nine innings. The Braves series was really all it was cracked up to be. We took two of three in three extremely low scoring games. The combined score for the series was 5 to 5. The hitting was down on both sides, but the pitching and the Mariner defense was phenomenal. Game 2 of the series saw Jamie Moyer get his first loss in 8 starts, but he still stays at the top of the league with 10 wins on the season. Freddy Garcia continued to pitch well, winning 2 to 1. Next week we play only our second full 7-game schedule with 4 against the Angels and 3 against our geographic rival, San Diego. The Angels are 10.5 games behind us at 34-32 on the year and 5-5 out of their last ten. San Diego is terrible. This is a good opportunity for us to start another long winning streak, but our hitters will have to pick it up after such a slow week. The M's only scored 10 runs in 6 games last week; frankly it's a miracle we won three with that kind of performance.

Mariner of the Week:Ichiro was without a doubt the man this week. He led the team with .458 batting average (11 for 24) and 4 stolen bases. He's now batting .339 on the season, leads the majors with 94 hits, and is tied for the American League stolen base lead with 18. In one inning of Sunday night's game he reached first on an infield single, stole second, stole third, and scored on an infield ground out from Brett Boone. That kind of run manufacturing can't be beat, and Ichiro is most effective when he steal's bases like that.

2003-06-15T23:40:00.000-05:00

MLB Report

In my opinion there were three big news items from baseball this week, and at least two of them will not be new news to most of you. But the biggest one of them in the overall scope of baseball was Roger Clemens getting his 300th win and 4,000th strikeout in the same game. Clemens beat the Cardinals 5 to 2 Friday and became the 21st pitcher in MLB history to record number 300. Being the 21st to accomplish this feat, he's tied with Lefty Grove and Early Wynn for 19th on the list. Clemens needs 7 more to pass Mickey Welch, 9 to pass Charley Radbourn, and 11 to pass Tom Seaver. Getting 11 more may be a tall order for him unless the Yankees make some serious improvements to the bullpen. I suppose if he won every start for the rest of the year he could pass Gaylord Perry at 314, but that is very unlikely. He became only the 3rd pitcher to reach 4,000 K's with only Steve Carlton (4,136) and Nolan Ryan (5,714) ahead of him. He has an outside shot at passing Carlton, but he'll have to be sharp the rest of the way. In other news, Roy Oswalt, Pete Munro, Kirk Saarloos, Brad Lidge, Octavio Dotel, and Billy Wagner no-hit the Yankees last Wednesday. It was the first time the Yankees had gone hitless since 1958. Certainly a six-pitcher no-no is less impressive than a one-man gig, but it still takes a lot to hold any team hitless for 9 innings, especially a team with the kind of hitters New York has. The Atlanta Braves/Seattle Mariners series was the other big story of the week, although you wouldn't know based on the TV coverage. FOX TV left the Braves/M's game to pick up the rain delayed Cardinals/Yankees game for their national broadcast. I don't know what the folks in the Northwest got to seebut here in the South (an area that is very much devoted to the Braves) Fox felt we would be more interested in the Yankees (who we generally hate) and the Cardinals (who we generally ignore). On top of the market issues relating to the South, the series was between the best team in the NL against the best team in the AL. There is no way that the Yankees/Cardinals was a better game or a more attractive series - especially since the news from that series (Clemens) happened the day before. I know this has turned into a rant from a bitter Mariners fan, but come on! The M's have had the best record in the AL for 3 or 4 weeks now, and we still have to fight for press. You might hear a word about them right after the "What's Wrong with the Yankees" story. Interleague play takes a break the first of next week and resumes this weekend with the first of two "Geographic Rival" weekends. We'll get to see exciting matchups in the Bay area (A's and Giant's), The Windy City Classic (Cubs and White Sox), a Sub way series (Mets and Yankees), and other compelling matchups like the Rowdy and Nasty Fan contest between the Philles and Red Sox. Then there's the brainless Geographic matchups like Detroit vs. Colorado and an I-5 extremeties series between Seattle and San Diego. Can you even wait?

2003-06-11T13:55:00.000-05:00

Having been a father now for three weeks, I've learned something about babies (at least mine). Most people think babies are good at three things: eating, sleeping, and expelling gas from one end or another. In truth, they're only good at eating and sleeping. Their inability to burp and poop seems to cause more trouble and frustration in their little lives than anything else. The sad face in the picture below was caused by just such a frustration (although she was upset about that Edgar Martinez thing too). I find it amazing that the sorts of bodily functions that get you in trouble when you're five are encouraged when you're an infant.

2003-06-10T17:53:00.000-05:00

This was how Sophie felt this afternoon when she read this on ESPN.com:

Does Edgar Martinez belong in the Hall of Fame?

No, he doesn't. I think the world of Edgar Martinez, one of the game's good guys and greatest hitters. But we don't have any historical precedent for putting a longtime DH in the Hall of Fame, and it seems to me that if we are going to elect a DH, he should have substantially more than 2,000 hits or substantially more than 300 home runs. Right now, Martinez is at about 2030 and 290. So unless he can continue hitting for another two or three seasons -- and you know, I wouldn't put it past him -- I simply won't be able to throw my weight behind his candidacy. - Rob Neyer

Now that you've read what Rob said, I'm sure you feel the same way Sophie did. And really, who wouldn't?

2003-06-10T01:25:00.000-05:00

You may have already seen this on A minor, but my sister-in-law Shannon now has her very own blog. Even though Jon stole my thunder and violated my own personal (and completely unspoken) outing policy, I give you . . . a peck of gold.

Just a thought, though. Do you think she means a peck of gold as in a chicken pecks at the ground and, low and behold, a piece of gold amongst the pecked objects, or does it mean a peck of gold as in a quarter of a bushel of gold? Perhaps the meaning is two-fold, or even more-fold like the four-fold meaning of The Dukes of Hazzard.

2003-06-08T21:14:00.000-05:00

Mariner Report

We went 5 and 1 this week and have won 11 of our last 12. We still have the best record in baseball (42-19), which we share with the Atlanta Braves. Next week's schedule may be toughest week we've had yet. We start with three against the Montreal Expos (37-26) and then three with Atlanta. The Expos will be without their star, Vladamir Guerrero, for the duration of the series. The pitching matchups for the Braves series should stack up like this: Russ Ortiz v. Freddy Garcia, Mike Hampton v. Jamie Moyer, and Greg Maddux v. Gil Meche. Ichiro and Bret Boone continue to move up the AL leader board. Ichiro is 2nd in hits (81) and 3rd in stolen bases (14). Boone is 3rd in home runs (17) and 4th in RBI's (49). Jamie Moyer became the first pitcher in either league to win 10, and he's now 3rd in AL ERA (2.93) and 5th in K's (64). As a whole the team is hitting very well with four starters batting over .300 (Ichiro, Boone, Edgar Martinez, Carlos Guillen) and two others not far behind (Randy Winn .295 and John Olerud .294). Freddy Garcia has won three in a row and moved his record to .500 (6-6). I was surprised the other day when I noticed Olerud only has two homers on the season. That is definitely below his normal pace. A second left-hander will be in the bullpen Tuesday night when we face the Expos. The relief corps became a little more balanced Friday afternoon when we acquired left-hander Matt White from the Boston Red Sox for minor league outfielder Sheldon Fulse. "We've been looking for another left-hander to add to our bullpen depth and we think Matt should fit in nicely," said M's GM Pat Gillick. Julio Mateo will likely be sent back to Tacoma to make room for White.

Mariner of the Week: This week's choice is a no-brainer. Although Ichiro and Boone continue to hit well, I just can't deny Jamie Moyer. Moyer went 2 and 0 with 14 scoreless innings pitched and 12 strikeouts. Moyer has the best record in the game (10-2) and should finally be chosen for his first All-Star game. He might even get the start. I guess Pat Gillick knew what he was doing when he signed Moyer (40) to a three-year deal

2003-06-08T20:31:00.000-05:00

MLB Report

Major League Baseball was busy this week with the Sammy Sosa/corked bat situation. Without going into great depth, I have three thoughts on the matter: 1) I believe Sosa is telling the truth about it being a mistake. 2) Corked bats do not make an appreciable difference in how far a batted ball travels. 3) Sosa's 8-game suspension is fair and consistent with suspensions from similar cases. Roger Clemens again failed to nail down his 300th win. Clemens pitched well against the Cubs, but he got the loss after Juan Acevedo allowed a 3-run homer to Eric Karros. Clemens was responsible for the two runners on base. His next opportunity is likely to come Friday against the Cardinals and Matt Morris. Other than these two stories the rest of the MLB news is just interleague play and injuries. The only especially interesting series' are between Atlanta and Oakland and Atlanta and Seattle. On the injury front, Curt Schilling broke his hand (DL), Cubs' 1B Hee Seop Choi has a concussion (DL), Vladamir Guerrero has a sore back (day-to-day), and Alex Rodriguez has a bruised knee (day-to-day). Pedro Martinez is scheduled to return from the disabled list Wednesday against the Cardinals.

2003-06-01T19:11:00.000-05:00

Mariner Report

What a great week! 6 and 0. After loosing the series against the Twins last week, we swept them in four this week. We also came out of the week with a 5-game lead over the A's. Things are going so well that Freddy Garcia won two games. Interleague play starts Tuesday. I have to admit that this time of the year scares me because there are just so many unknowns when we play the NL teams. It was this time last year when things turned around in the AL West; the A's and Angels got hot for the rest of the year after having success against the NL teams. However, the interleague schedule does work quite nicely for the M's. We drew the weakest NL division (NL East). The Braves are the only really strong team we'll have to face. Then, when interleague switches to "Geographic Rival" week, we really come out good: Six games against the 16-40 San Diego Padres, while the rest of the division looks like this: Rangers vs. Astros, A's vs. Giants, and Angels vs. Dodgers. Our interleague schedule starts off with Philadalphia. Jamie Moyer will be going for his ML leading 9th win against Kevin Millwood. Millwood is the toughest pitcher we'll face for all of the interleague games. We finish the week with a series against the Mets, before returning home for the Braves and Expos. As of this very moment we are tied with the Braves for the best record in baseball (although the Braves have not yet played today), so this series should be especially interesting. Ichiro and Edgar Martinez are currently leading in votes at their positions for the All-Star game. I expect they'll both hang on to those leads. Bret Boone and Jamie Moyer will likely make the team as reserves. Boone hit his 200th career home run this week, and John Olerud is just 11 hits away from 2,000.

Mariner of the Week: I have to give an honorable mention to Freddy Garcia for his 2 wins and to Joel Pineiro for his shutout of the Twins. I have not been able to make a decision for just one winner this week, so we'll have our first ever tie for the MOW. Bret Boone and Edgar Martinez were both fantastic this week. Boone went 12 for 32 (.375) with 4 doubles, 4 homer runs, and 10 RBI's. Edgar went 11 for 30 (.367) and also had 4 homer runs and 10 RBI's. If both of these guys maintain their pace for 40+ homers and 130+ RBI's we'll be in good shape the rest of the year.

2003-06-01T18:40:00.000-05:00

MLB Update

This week featured several interesting matchups and games. In my report last week, I made a mistake about the next opportunity for Roger Clemens to record his 300th win. He actually pitched today against the Tigers. He left the game with the lead, but the Yankee bullpen failed to hold it down. They Yanks did end up winning 10 to 9 in 17 innings, but Clemens was stuck with a no decision. His next attempt will be against the Cubs on June 7th at Wrigley Field. Former teammates Greg Maddux and Tom Glavine faced off this week for the first time in their careers. Maddux got the win as the Braves beat the Mets 5 to 2. Sammy Sosa returned from the diabled list, and so far, he has looked overmatched. He did, however, drive in the winning run in the bottom of the 16th against the Astros; the score of the game was 1-0. This week also saw the first significant trade of the year with the Red Sox acquiring closer Byung Hyun Kim from Arizona for 3B Shea Hillenbrand. This was an excellent move for both teams now, which doesn't happen very much these days. Usually a trade will be a lopsided deal so that one team can cut payroll, but in this case the Red Sox get a front-line closer, which they'll need if they want to stay on top of the Yankees, and the Diamonbacks get a true run producer to bolster their anemic offense. In order to make room on their roster Arizona released Matt Williams who was the last remaining original Diamondback from the inaugural team in 1997. MLB released the current standings in All-Star voting this week. Unless things change, the NL squad will look like this: Ivan Rodriguez (catcher), Jeff Bagwell (1st base), Jeff Kent (2nd base), Scott Rolen (3rd base), Edgar Renteria (short stop), and outfielders Barry Bonds (leading NL vote getter), Sammy Sosa, and Vladamir Guerrero (DH to be named by NL manager Dusty Baker). The AL team would be: Jorge Posada (catcher), Jason Giambi (1st base), Alfonso Soriano (2nd base; leading AL vote getter), Troy Glaus (3rd base), Alex Rodriguez (short stop), outfielders Ichiro Suzuki, Manny Ramirez, and Bernie Williams, and DH Edgar Martinez. Out of this group I see three cases were the player probably doesn't deserve an All-Star selection. Sammy Sosa and Bernie Williams had/have injury issues, and Jason Giambi just has not played well enough to justify such an honor. There's at least another 3 weeks to vote, so these rosters could change between now and then.

2003-05-31T23:56:00.000-05:00

Goodbye, David Cone

David Cone announced his retirement this week. During the late 80's, Cone was one of my favorite players. He was the unheralded ace of the Mets, who were my favorite team at the time. Cone was a phenomenal pitcher who will likely be forgotten. Look at these career highlights: In his first full season with the Mets (1988) he went 20-3 with 2.22 ERA and 213 K's . . . Lead his league in strike outs twice ('90 - 233, '91 - 241) . . . Struck out 19 Phillies in a game 10/06/91 . . . Helped the Toronto Blue Jays win their second World Series in 1992 . . . Played on 5 World Series winning teams (Jays '92, Yankees 1996, '98, '99, '00) . . . Won the Cy Young Award in the strike-shortened 1994 season (16-5, 2.94 ERA, 132 K's in 23 starts) . . . Went 20-7 as a Yankee in 1997 . . . Became the 15th pitcher to throw a perfect game when he did so as a Yankee 07/18/99 . . . Five time All-Star ('88, '92, '94, '97, '99) . . . 4-time Top 5 finisher in Cy Young voting (3rd in '88, 1st in '94, 4th in '95, 4th in '98) . . . 4-time Top 5 finisher in in ERA, 4-time Top 5 finisher in Wins . . . 10-time Top 5 finisher in in Strike Outs . . . 8-3 in Postseason play . . . 194 career wins, 3.46 career ERA, 2,668 career strike outs (17th All-Time). Above all, David Cone was a one of the most dominant and consistent pitchers of the 90's and truly a classy guy. The baseball world will miss him.

2003-05-28T11:58:00.000-05:00

Dad sent me this link to the dullest blog in the world.

2003-05-27T23:43:00.000-05:00

My Dad gave us a digital camera because he knows how bad we are about never developing pictures. My grandfather was always a madman with the camera. I remember getting up on several Christmas mornings excited about the day but still groggy and being asked to smile and stare directly into a set of four lights on a pole and each light was brighter than the sun. Dad takes pictures but he's normal about it, and Rachel is a photography major, so there hasen't been much need for us to develop those pictures from the past. But it's good to have the camera and now we don't have an excuse. It's way better than the way we used to do it. Amy and I would sit down by the fire and pull out that box of undeveloped rolls and say, "Remember this roll of film? Those were some great times."

2003-05-26T17:56:00.000-05:00

We're Home

Amy and Sophie came home from the hospital Friday afternoon. We're both elated to be home and to have another person sharing our house. Now that she's here, that makes Deacon Blues the next father-to-be in our little blogging world. Remy is in the hole.

2003-05-26T17:50:00.000-05:00

Mariner Report

We went a disappointing 3/3 this week. We probably would have swept the Royals except Freddy Garcia pitched against them and the Twins were just too much. One interesting thing about the Twins series was the matchup between the two best defensive teams in the game, especially the competition between Mike Cameron and Twins standout Torii Hunter. Both guys made Baseball Tonight's Web Gems during the series, robbing home runs from each other. We face the Royals and Twins again this week as we embark on a 12 game road trip that includes our first interleague matchups against Philadelphia and the Mets. Edgar Martinez seems to be in a bit of a slump, but he's still good enough to be #15 in AL batting average (.311). Ichiro is #12 (.317), and the big surprise is Carlos Guillen at #11 (.318). Ichiro is also 6th in hits (63) and stolen bases (9), Edgar is 5th in RBI's (37) and 9th in slugging (.568), and Bret Boone is 4th in home runs (12) and 8th in slugging (.569). As for the pitchers, Jamie Moyer is 2nd in wins (7), and 7th in strikeouts, and Gil Meche is 3rd in wins (6) and 9th in ERA (2.86). As a team, we're pretty average in hitting but 3rd in ERA (3.87).

Mariner of the Week: Carlos Guillen is a no-brainer this week. So far he's a great answer for the #2 slot in the order between Ichiro and Boone. Last week he went 9 for 20 (.450) with 5 runs scored.

2003-05-26T17:06:00.000-05:00

MLB Update

The Dodgers have been on fire winning 10 in a row, highlighted by closer Eric Gagne who saved 6 straight striking out 12 consectutive batters in 4 appearances. Meanwhile, the Yankees have been terrible having lost 9 of their last 11. Roger Clemens won #299 against the Red Sox in Fenway Park, but failed to notch #300 in Yankee Stadium - also against the Red Sox. He'll get his next shot when interleague play begins and the Yankees travel to Chicago and play in Wrigley Field. The Yankess have not played their since they swept the Cubs in the 1938 World Series. Roger Clemens has never pitched there at all. The only other interesting matchups in the first week of interleague play are the Angels against the surprising Montreal Expos in San Juan the Cardinals and Orioles square off (Duane cares). Fred McGriff is sneaking up on 500 home runs - he hit #486 this week. Pedro Martinez, Bernie Williams, Troy Percival, and Eric Hinske all went on the diasabled list; Percivals hip injury is career threatening.

2003-05-23T00:07:00.000-05:00

I realized after posting that announcement that I did not include her name: Sophie Adelaide Booth. Thanks to everyone for their thoughts, prayers, and congratulations. Here's another picture.

2003-05-22T11:03:00.000-05:00

Here She Is

She was born at 4:55 PM Wednesday the 21st. She weighed 7 lb. 2 oz. and measured 20.25 inches. Mother and Baby are doing very well.

2003-05-19T16:19:00.000-05:00

Mariner Report

The M's had good week at 5-1. I'm sure you'll all be surprised that the one loss was thanks to Freddy Garcia, who seems to be the only Mariner not pulling his weight. I don't hate the guy or anything, but he's supposed to be the ace and he's been far from that. The A's and Yankees helped us look good this week. The A's went 3-3 and left the M's with a 2-game lead in the division, and the Yankees went a miserable 1-5 leaving the M's with the best record in the AL. Kazuhiro Sasaki has looked very good since coming off the DL - in four appearances he hasn't allowed a run and he picked up the save on Friday and Saturday. It's hard to say hop difficult the schedule will be for the next two weeks. Next week we have the Royals and Twins at home then the same two teams on the road the following week. These are the best two teams in the AL Central, but I'm just not convinced they'll be able to handle the M's or the other AL West teams. I'll be satisfied is they go 8-4 over the course of the 12 games. I've got conflicting reports about the M's starter for the first game against the Royals. The M's website says Ryan Franklin, but USA Today says it's Garcia. Regardless we'll be facing Royals rookie ace Runelvys Hernandez. Regarding last weeks discusion about the M's #2 hitter: maybe Carlos Guillen is the answer. He's batting .297 and hit a homer out of the 2-hole today.

Mariner of the Week: There are a lot of contenders this week - Joel Pineiro won 2 games, Edgar had 3 homers in 3 consecutive games, Bret Boone had 4 homers and 9 RBI's, but I have to go with Ichiro. As ESPN's Dan Patrick would say, Ichiro has been nothing short of en fuego. Over the last two weeks, he's raised his average from .260 to .318. His line for this week: 17 for 32 (.531), 5 runs scored, 1 homer, 2 stolen bases.

2003-05-18T17:42:00.000-05:00

Odd Thoughts on MLB Week 7

I have a little more time and a few more thoughts this week, so the update will be a bit longer. Let's start with Roger Clemens, who started the season just 7 wins short of 300, started out 4-0, but has gone 0-2 in his last four starts. He'll be shooting for Win # 299 against the Red Sox on Wednesday. If he wins, he'll get the chance for # 300 on May 26th, also against Boston. I know Roger would like to already have that big win behind him, but I think it would be fitting for him to become the 19th pitcher in MLB history to notch 300 Wins against the team that thought he was washed up after the 1996 season. I hope the Yankees drop 4 of 6 to the Red Sox in those two series, but I'll wear my proverbial Yankees hat for Roger Clemens. In other Yankee news, the Yanks got swept by the Texas Rangers in Yankee Stadium for the first time ever - more on this later.
Earlier in the week New York Mets' managment informed the media they wanted All-Star catcher Mike Piazza to begin a shift to first base. Piazza has strongly resisted such a move whenever it's been mentioned in the past. Piazza then responded with a torrid week at the plate with 10 hits in 19 at bats (.526) including 3 home runs and 7 RBIs. He followed that by tearing his groin and going on the disabled list. He's expected to miss at least a month and could miss two. Piazza hits the DL just 3 homers short of passing Carlton Fisk for the most homers as a catcher.
Montreal Expos pitcher Zach Day was ejected from Friday's game against the Rockies for having a foreign substance (glue) on his pitching hand. Day was using the glue to cover a blister - not to cheat. Nevertheless, he was found to be in violation of MLB rules and tossed from the game. In other odd news, Red Sox outfielder Trot Nixon caught an outfield fly ball and tossed it into the stands thinking it was the third out rather than the second. The Walt Disney Company sold the defending champion Anaheim Angels to Arturo Moreno for $184 million. That seems to be a low price for a World Series Championship team. Moreno is the first Latino MLB owner, and that fact seems to be very important to the media. But the last time I checked, I haven't seen many Latinos or other minorities throwing $200 million dollars around. I assure you that when another team comes up for sale, if there's a non-white person slinging that kind of cash the MLB Commisioner's office would quickly approve the sale. It's not like the owners are trying to stay all white. Nobody's prejudice against the color green.
Now let's take a look at the standings and finish up with our first installment of "If the Playoffs Started Today." Over in the NL West The Giants have a 4 game lead on the Dodgers and that's the largest gap between any first and second place team in any division. The Chicago Cubs are still clinging to the #1 spot in the NL Central, but the Astros (2 out) and Cardinals (3 out) are sneaking up on them. The Cubs have maintained their position despite being without slugger Sammy Sosa. Over in the NL East The Braves are up 3 on Montreal and 6 on Philadelphia. At 30-13, the Braves have the best record in baseball. In the AL Central, The Royals - as predicted - have lost their spot at the top to the Twins. This is the first day all year the Royals have not been in first. The Boston Red Sox moved into a tie for first with the Yankees. The Yankees started their season 16-3 against the Blue Jays, Devil Rays, and Twins. Their 24 games against the AL West didn't go as well. They went 11-13, leaving them 27-16 overall - good for the second best record in the American League. The best team in the AL is your Seattle Mariners (28-15). The M's have opened a 2-game lead over the A's. If the playoffs started today, the NL would have the Braves facing the Cubs and the Giants against the wild-card Expos. The AL would be the Yankees vs. the Twins and the Mariners against the wild-card Red Sox.

2003-05-16T15:57:00.000-05:00

Survivor

Jenna won; what a scam. Those of us who are Survivor fans now know that Survivor 7 will be played in Panama, and USA Today printed this short note about Survivor 8:
'Survivor' alum converge for all-star show
The eighth edition of CBS' Survivor, airing in February, will have an all-star cast featuring contestants from previous installments of the hit reality show. Players are expected to include Jerri Manthey, Richard Hatch, Susan Hawk, Tina Wesson, Ethan Zohn and Rudy Bosch. Producers will raise the prize money to $2 million. The location has not been determined. - (USA Today 5/15/03)

2003-05-13T08:48:00.000-05:00

Vitamins

What's the deal with vitamin names anyway? We've got A through E, and then we skip to K. What happened to F through J? And do we really need 12 B vitamins? If we had just one vitamin B and gave 2 through 12 to other letters we could be all the way down to Vitamin Q. I have at least some idea what most of the vitamins do and where they come from except the B vitamins. Maybe it would be easier to remember vitamin F.

2003-05-12T01:01:00.000-05:00

Mariner Report

Well we went a sub-par 3 and 3 this week. Again we dropped 2 of 3 to the Yankees and without a sweep against them later this year, we'll lose the season series to them for the first time in at least three years. Oh well, we're done with them until August or September and we're headed to Cleveland and Detroit. Joel Pineiro opens the series with Cleveland against veteran lefty Brian Anderson. We really need to make this our first 6 and 0 week; we definitely have a favorable schedule to do so. We're still hanging on to first place in the West, but we're sharing it with the A's. It's too bad they didn't have a tougher time with the Yankees. The Mariner's batting order is beginning to trouble me a bit. I would like for Bob Melvin to come up with a line up and stick with it, specifically in the #2 hole between Ichiro and Boone. We've had Randy Winn in there, Willie Bloomquist and Mark McLemore. Last year I thought Cirillo would be the answer. McLemore is better suited to coming off the bench and batting 9th when he does get the start. Ideally Cirillo or Winn can step up and hit .290 to .315 and stay in that spot to give Ichiro protection and another baserunner for the middle of the order. Kazuhiro Sasaki returned from the DL and pitched two scoreless innings in two non-save situations. He appears to be healthy for the long haul. Freddy Garcia is the player of the week . . . for the Yankees.

Mariner of the Week: This is a tough call. Edgar had 3 homers, Ichiro had 10 hits, but I think I have to go with Jamie Moyer. This is Moyer's second MOW (Mariner of the Week) this year. Moyer's stats this week: 2 Wins, 12 Innings, 8 K's, 3.00 ERA.

2003-05-12T00:38:00.000-05:00

Odd Thoughts on MLB Week 6

Rafael Palmeiro became the 19th major league player to reach 500 home runs Sunday night. The shot was a three-run blast off Cleveland pitcher Dave Elder. The Rangers won that game 17 to 10. Yankees' ace Mike Mussina won his 7th game in his 7th start. No Yankees starter has done that since 1958. The Yankees also expect a boost this week when Derek Jeter returns Tuesday. Curt Schilling came off the disabled list and made an impressive start Friday: complete game shut out, 10 Ks no walks. In other injury news, Sammy Sosa went on the 15 day DL with an infected toe nail. He should return at the end of the 15 days. The first managerial firing of the year happened this week as the Florida Marlins sent Jeff Torborg packing and replaced him with 400 year old Jack McKeon. I doubt the Marlins will play any better for Jack. In last weeks report I encouraged you All-Star voters out there to not vote for Yankees. While most of the folks who read this report hate the Yankees, there is one Yankee fan who reads this and he asked why we should not vote for them, so I'll give you my answer with a bit of background. I used to be an All-Star voting purist. I voted strictly for the best players at each position regardless of any team loyalty only to find myself frustrated when the game roled around and it was filled with names rather than the most deserving players. Then I decided that rather than be frustrated, I should vote for the guys I want to see in the game. I don't vote exclusively for Seattle players, but I do tend to give them the benefit of the doubt. This year, there are two Yankees who definitely deserve to be elected to the AL squad (Alfonso Soriano and Jorge Posada) and one other who probably deserves it (Bernie Williams). But Jason Giambi, who has played terribly so far this year, will probably win the election too because he's got a big name and he's a Yankee. Palmeiro, Kansas City's Mike Sweeney, and Seattle's John Olerud are all more deserving than Giambi, but that probably won't change the outcome of the vote. So if you want to see your guys in the game, you've got to vote for them and vote for them often. And since most of the folks who read this hate the Yankees, they should refrain from voting for them. (Truth be told, it's not necessary to tell them - I just wanted to annoy Greydanus).

2003-05-07T21:12:00.000-05:00

The due date is almost past, and the baby has not come yet. I went to the docter with Amy today and we got to see the baby again.

In case this picture looks like nothing more than a black and white blob to you - that small black circle in the top-center is her right eye.

2003-05-07T21:05:00.000-05:00

Mother's Poem

With Mother's Day approaching, I thought I'd share another Garrison Keillor poem.

Some mornings I get up at five.
With four to mother, one to wive,
I find the hours from light to dark
Are not enough to matriarch
With goals for matriarchy high
Among the apples of my eye.

This little girl with golden braid
Expects her toast a certain shade;
Her scrambled eggs must meet the test
Of excellence and gently rest
Upon the toast and not beside.
The little boy wants his eggs fried
Yet not be greasy on his lips,
Accompanied by bacon strips
Fried till they resemble bark.
The older boy takes his toast dark
And if his golden eggs should not
Be poached and served up steaming hot,
Two slightly liquid yellow bumps
Of yolk in solid white, he slumps
Down in his chair and has a mood.
The oldest girl eats rabbit food,
Berries, nuts, sunflower seeds,
Leaves and stems, and as she feeds,
She is displeased. It's all my fault.
I bought her seeds containing salt.
And worse - some juice containing sugar.
She glares as if I were a crook or,
Worse, a mother short on sense
And guilty of child negligence.

Negligence in the name of love
Is just what we should have more of.
Don't mother birds after some weeks
Of looking at those upturned beaks
Deliberately the food delay,
Hoping to hear their goslings say,
"What are these feathered floppy things
Attached to us? You think they're wings?"

This helpful trusty friendly Frau
Is starting her neglect right now.
The clothes you counted on the leap
Up while you were fast asleep
And wash themselves for you to wear
Have let you down. They just sat there.
The bicycle you thought would pick
It self up when the rain got thick,
The homework you forgot to do,
Assuming I would tell you to -
My child, you have been betrayed.
The world you thought was neatly made,
Its corners tucked in like a sheet,
Is uncomposed and incomplete.
For years I carried on a hoax.
I made you think that scrambled yolks
Or poached or boiled, fried or shirred,
Are how they come out of the bird.
I made you think that big dustballs
Tiptoe softly down the halls
Out to the trash, that your wool skirt
(The one with emblems of dessert)
Took a cab down to the cleaner,
In answer to a court subpoena.

No matter what you have been told,
The rainbow holds no pot of gold,
Babies aren't found under rocks
Or in Sears Roebuck catalogues,
Those coins weren't put there by an elf -
The Tooth Fairy is me myself,
The Easter Bunny's make-believe,
Cows don't talk on Christmas Eve,
The moon is not made of green cheese,
And eggs don't come the way you please,
Served by hens on silver trays,
And neither does much else these days.

2003-05-05T18:03:00.000-05:00

Duane posted a creedal list of affirmations and denials. While I agree with a lot of it, I certainly have some objections or at least questions (we all know about his odd dislike of soup), but I can allow love to cover most of them. I must, however, stand up for styrofoam. As a disposable beverage container, styrofoam is second to none. Ice lasts ten times longer in styrofoam vs. paper or plastic. And for coffee, well, when you have styrofoam you don't need one of those dumb little cardboard sweaters to keep from burning your hand. Remember years ago when Century 21 had an ad where about 20 agents in gold jackets picked up a two-story house? Do you know what that house was made of? Styrofoam.

2003-05-05T17:41:00.000-05:00

Stella Awards

The Stella Awards are given by an independent group that recognizes successful lawsuits that are beyond frivolous. Stella was the name of the woman who sued McDonald's when she spilled hot coffee and burned herself. Here are a few from 2002 that I thought were worth sharing:

Jerry Williams of Little Rock, Arkansas, was awarded $14,500 and medical expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his next-door neighbor's beagle. The beagle was on a chain in its owner's fenced yard. The award was less than sought because the jury felt the dog might have been just a little provoked at the time by Mr. Williams who was shooting it repeatedly with a pellet gun.

A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber Carson of Lancaster, Pennsylvania, $113,500 after she slipped on a soft drink spill and broke her tailbone. The beverage was on the floor because Ms. Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an argument.

A jury of her peers awarded Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas, $780,000 after breaking her ankle by tripping over a toddler who was running inside a furniture store. The owners of the store were understandably surprised at the verdict, considering the misbehaving little toddler was Ms. Robertson's son.

2003-05-05T00:36:00.000-05:00

Pregnancy Update - Week 40

We all very excited now that we're in the "final" week of the pregnancy. The due date is Wednesday. Amy has had a few contractions and has complained of general discomfort in the last few days. She is scheduled to see the doctor Wednesday and we'll have another ultra-sound if the baby has not been born. I guess if we don't have a baby by then, we'll just wait longer.

2003-05-05T00:32:00.000-05:00

Mariner Report

A 4 and 2 week is not a disappointment considering the schedule. We did lose the series to the Yankees 2-1 but we played well overall and Joel Pineiro proved he could be a big-game pitcher giving up only two runs and dueling with Mike Mussina. I'm still waiting for Ichiro to heat up. I know he hit a homer tonight, but the only other highlight from this week for him was being mentioned by Chris Schlect in Credenda/Agenda. We have the same schedule this week except it will be at Safeco rather than on the road. Another 4 and 2 would be acceptable especially since we get a break the following week with Cleveland and Detroit. The pitching matchups in the series with the Yanks will be Jamie Moyer vs. Andy Pettitte, Joel Pineiro vs. Mike Mussina, and Ryan Franklin vs. Jeff Weaver. Edgar Martinez collected his 2000th career hit this on Saturday. He is currently 3rd in the AL with a .363 average. Kazuhiro Sasaki, on the disabled list since April 23 with a strained muscle in his lower back, will pitch on a rehab assignment Tuesday for Class A Inland Empire (San Bernardino, Calf.). Sasaki will be re-evaluated Wednesday, then could rejoin the Mariners on Thursday. "We'll see how his health is, how his arm is, re-evaluate and go from there," manager Bob Melvin said.

Mariner of the Week: Deacon Blues lobbied for Mike Cameron who went 8 for 18 with 2 homers and 9 RBIs, but I have to go with Gil Meche. Meche went 2 and 0 including 7.2 scoreless innings against the Yankees. His totals for the week: 2 wins, 7 Ks, 0.71 ERA in 12.2 innings.

2003-05-05T00:10:00.000-05:00

Odd Thoughts on MLB Week 5

MLB started taking on-line votes for this years All-Star game at US Cellular Field (New Comisky) in Chicago. If you want to vote, click here. Please do not vote for any Yankees. I do encourage you to vote, but four and half weeks of baseball doesn't seem to be enough to make a good decision on the All-Stars. The Players Association also approved a measure to award home-field advantage in the World Series to the league that wins the All-Star game. I like that they are trying to make the game mean something, but I think that there are some other issues that make this a bad idea. For instance, will the AL pitchers throw good pitches to Barry Bonds now that the game means something? They say this will be on a trial basis only (like the DH was), so we'll have to see how it turns out. The suspensions for hit batsmen have gotten out of hand. Pitchers should be able to throw inside and retaliate on intentional beanings. I just don't think the Kansas City Royals are for real. They're still leading the AL Central, but I think they're in for a big surprise when they face the Yankees and the AL West. Milestone Watch: Roger Clemens - stuck at 297 Wins after two losses this week. Rafael Palmeiro - 498 Home Runs.

2003-05-01T08:43:00.000-05:00

Grover Cleveland Alexander is the only Major League Baseball player to be named after an American president and to be portrayed by a future American president in a movie (played by Ronald Reagan in The Winning Team, 1952).

2003-04-27T21:00:00.000-05:00

Thank Goodness We Can Always Find Divers

I realized the other day how wonderful it is that the broader diving community has not only invented a flag but also felt the need to have it shrunk down and stuck on all of their vehicles. Just last week a friend of mine drove into a lake. In a panic I searched frantically for someone to rescue him. Thank goodness I saw that little diving flag on the bumper of a passing car. I flagged down the driver who immediately came to the rescue. Thanks Mr. Diving Flag Inventor!

2003-04-27T20:52:00.000-05:00

Mariner Report

Things keep getting better for the M's. We went 5/1 this week, which is great, but it stinks to lose that 1 to Detroit. Closer Kazuhiro Sasaki went on the disabled list. The Blues and I had suspected something was wrong just because of his lack of effectiveness. It's nice to have a phenomenal bullpen so that you can lose a guy like Sasaki and not have to worry. Jeff Nelson and Arthur Rhodes should be more than sufficient. I've been very pleased with Dodger's cast-off Giovanni Carrera so far. He's currently 1/0 with 2.05 ERA in 13.1 innings pitched. I was astonished the other day when Mike Cameron hit a walk-off grand slam against the Indians. I had gotten used to having very little faith in Cameron and it was good to see him get a clutch hit. Cameron should be back in the line up Tuesday after having the weekend off with a slightly strained groin. The M's have a much tougher schedule this week as we hit the road for three against the Yankees and three against the White Sox. We're 17/11 against the Yankess over the past three years. The schedule doesn't get any better next week; we have the Yanks and ChiSox again.

Mariner of the Week: John Olerud. The Mariner's Mr. Consistent hit .391 with an insane .520 on base percentage. He also scored 5 runs and drove in 6. All this along with his always stellar defense.

2003-04-27T20:28:00.000-05:00

Odd Thoughts on MLB Week 4

I thought about jumping ahead and doing my baseball report yesterday, but it's good that I waited for the action today. The Cardinals and Marlins played a 20-inning epic, which the Cards won 7 to 6; they played ten scoreless innings after the 9th. Just two weeks after missing a start due to injury Phillies ace Kevin Millwood got the win in a 1-0 game against the Giants - he threw a no-hitter. Randy Johnson returned from the DL today and got his first win of the season striking out 12 in only six innings. In other individual performance news, Richie Sexson of the Brewers had a 3-homer day on Friday. Andy Pettite was the first Yankee starter to get a loss when he lost to the Angels last Wednesday. The Yankees still have the best record in the game (20/5) despite loosing two this week. Finally, in an effort to show that Toronto is safe despite the SARS outbreak, the Toronto Blue Jays' parent company is offering $1 dollar (Canadian) tickets for Tuesday's game against the Texas Rangers. ``We encourage everyone to attend the game on Tuesday evening and show the world that Toronto is safe, Toronto is dynamic and Toronto continues to be a world-class city,'' company president Ted Rogers said. This offer came four days after the World Health Organization warned against travel to Toronto because of the outbreak of severe acute respiratory syndrome. Milestone Watch: Roger Clemens - 297 Wins, Rafael Palmeiro - 497 Home Runs.

2003-04-22T17:38:00.000-05:00

The Solo Sock

Of life’s many troubles, I’ve known quite a few:
Bad plumbing and earaches and troubles with you,
But the saddest of all, when it’s all said and done,
Is to look for your socks and find only one.
Here’s a series of single socks stacked in a row.
Where in the world did their fellow socks go?

About missing socks, we have very few facts.
Some say cats steal them to use for backpacks,
Or desperate Norwegians willing to risk
Prison to steal socks to make lutefisk.
But the robbery theories just don’t hold water:
Why would they take one and not take the odder?

Now, some people lose socks, and though you may scoff,
Some go to shows and have their socks knocked off.
Some use a sock to mop up spilled gin with
And some people had just one sock to begin with.
But for most missing socks, or sock migration,
Sockologists have no quick explanation.

Socks are independent, studies have shown,
And most feel a need for some time alone.
Some socks are bitter from contact with feet;
Some, seeking holiness, go on retreat;
Some need adventure and cannot stay put;
Some socks feel useless and just underfoot.
But whatever the reason these socks lose control,
Each sock has feelings down deep in its sole.

If you wake in the night and hear creaking and scraping,
It’s the sound of a sock, bent on escaping.
The socks on the floor that you think the kids dropped?
They’re socks that went halfway, got tired, and stopped.

It might help if, every day,
As you don your socks, you take time to say:
“Thank you, dear socks, for a job that is thankless.
You comfort my feet from tiptoe to ankles,
Working in concert, a cotton duet,
Keeping them snug and absorbing the sweat,
And yet you smell springlike, a regular balm,
As in Stravinsky’s Le Sacre du Printemps,
And so I bless you with all of my heart
And pray that the two of you never shall part.
I love you, dear socks, you are socko to me,
The most perfect pair that I ever did see.
I thank you and bless you now. Vobiscum Pax.”
Then you bend down and put on your socks.

This may help, but you must accept
That half of all socks are too proud to be kept,
And, as with children, their leaving is ritual.
Half of all socks need to be individual.

- Garrison Keillor, We Are Still Married

2003-04-22T09:04:00.000-05:00

News from PETA

I caught a radio interview yesterday with Dan Shannon, a spokesman for People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA). I thought it was strange for him to be on a sports talk station, but I listened anyway. It turns out that PETA has sent letters to the NBA's Yao Ming and Amaure Stoudamire asking them to refuses the NBA Rookie of the Year award should they receive it. The award is sponsored by the American Dairy Association - you know, the "Got Milk?" people. The reason for the request is to get higher profile people to speak out against the way milk cows are treated by dairy farmers. Another argument as to why they should refuse the award was that %75 of blacks (Stoudamire) and %90 of Asians (Ming) are lactose intollerant. He even argued that milk and other dairy products were not necessary for a healthy body/diet. All I can say is, "Got bone-density issues?"

2003-04-21T01:35:00.000-05:00

From the Strange Meat Files

Friday night I went to a restaurant called Bubba Luigi's. I'd been hearing about the place for over a year but Friday was my first visit, and they really knocked my socks off. The menu was an impressive array of Italian and Cajun cuisine. They also had three specials including Camel. That's right, the hump-backed ship of the desert Camel. Naturally I couldn't pass up the opportunity to have the camel, and I must say it was fantastic. I'm not sure what particular cut it was, although I suspect it was comparable to a beef tenderloin. It was cut into half inch slices and cooked medium rare and covered with a Thai peanut sauce. It was definitely red meat and it had a stronger flavor than beef, and it was surprisingly tender considering it was so lean. I had a 10 to 12 oz. portion without the slightest trace of fat. I highly recommend this place to everybody but Duane. They have the bizarre meats on Thursday and sell the rest throughout the weekend. Next weekend they're serving Yak, which the owner says is better than the Camel. I know he's served Rattle Snake in the past along with more common things like Elk, Bison, and Bear, aside from the Aligator, which is always on the menu (this is Louisiana). Next time I go I'm going to ask him if he can get Hippopotamus; I've never heard anything about Hippo, but it seems like it would make a great meal.

2003-04-21T01:15:00.000-05:00

Mariner Report

This week went much better than the first two with the M's posting a 5 and 2 mark that could have easily been 6 and 1 if Kazuhiro Sasaki had been able to hold off the Angels Saturday night. Although Sasaki had 2 saves this week he also had 2 blown saves. Despite his poor performance, the M's bullpen still has the lowest ERA in the game. Here's how we stand now that we've wrapped up our first run through our division rivals: 3/3 vs. Anaheim, 4/2 vs. Texas, 4/3 vs. Oakland leaving us 11/8 on the season and 1 game ahead of the A's in 1st place. The bats looked much better, although Ichiro is still not measuring up to expectations. Now is our chance to establish ourselves as the best in the West. Other than 2 series against the Yankees, we have a pretty easy schedule until the middle of June, highlighted by next week's line up against Cleveland and Detroit.

Mariner of the Week: Honorable mention last week turned into full honors this week for Bret Boone. Boone batted .393 with 3 HRs and 7 RBI. Maybe 2001 wasn't a fluke.

2003-04-21T00:54:00.000-05:00

Odd Thoughts on MLB Week 3

The Tigers are worse than I initially imagined: they've opened the season 1 and 16 - ouch. Meanwhile the Yankees keep rolling, setting a record by having their starters open the season 13 and 0, highlighted by Mike Mussina's 4 wins in 4 starts. In other Yankee news, one of their big acquisitions of the off-season, Cuban defector Jose Contreras, has been sent to AAA Columbus. He's your average $5 million a year minor leager. And what's with the White Sox's fans? After attacking the Royals' first base coach Tom Gamboa last year, umpire Laz Diaz was attacked by another White Sox fan in their series against Kansas City. One of the attackers, Eric Dybas, apologized and said (I'm not making this up), "I wanted to do something that would stick out a little more, but I never intended for it to be like I was trying to inflict any danger on anybody." Good move, buddy. You definitely stuck out a bit more, and you're going to make it tougher for fans all over the country to get into the game without bag searches. While Randy Johnson is now having some injury problems, Greg Maddux, Curt Schilling, and Pedro Martinez all got their first wins of the season. Rest assured Johnson will bounce back too. The Atlanta Braves, who started slowly, have now moved to within 1 game of 1st place in the mediocre NL East, and more importantly the Mariners finished the week in 1st place in the AL West. Milestone Watch: Roger Clemens - 296 Wins, Rafael Palmeiro 495 Home Runs.

2003-04-16T18:23:00.000-05:00

Meanwhile, Back at the Ranch

I've been working hard trying to get things taken care of at the house. It seems that everytime I finish a project I have two more to add to the list. It's not bad though. It beats putting in a lot of time working on a rental.

Only three more weeks until the due date. Everything seems to be going just fine.

2003-04-15T15:58:00.000-05:00

Softball, Flag Football, and Half-Court Basketball

We had our first AAPC softball practice last night and it went pretty well. Earlier that day I went to the batting cage to take a few practice swings on the slow-pitch machine. There was a Little League kid there who thought it was odd that I was getting in the softball cage. I told him that when you're old you'll be thankful for things like softball. That made me think about the sports we love and how generally unatainable they are. You just can't duplicate most sports the way they are played at higher/organized levels, mostly because we just can't do it physically. We don't want to run up and down the basketball court (we could but we'd be out of breath in about three minutes). We don't want to get pounded by Bart in a game of tackle football. And we don't have the catcher's equipment or the arm strength/ability to do reall baseball pitching. But we do have lower impact games like those mentioned in the title, and I think that's pretty good.

2003-04-14T12:23:00.000-05:00

The Comfort Zone - Part 2

Part 1 of The Comfort Zone was written by Christin and can be found at verbingnouns. In it she talks about moving and "being home" and the break in periods required for feeling like you're at home. I have an almost identical travel history, except that I have not lived in Nacogdoches, and totally hear what she's saying about the roads in Texarkana and Moscow. I've been in the greater Monroe area for almost three years now, and I hope I never miss the roads in Monroe. I have a job where I drive about 100 miles a day in the rural areas west of Monore. I like those roads. I didn't mind the roads in Ruston. But I don't have the slightest of fond sentiments for Louisville Ave., US 165, 18th St., all of Downtown Monroe, and even I-20 from Well Road to Millhaven. The road planners for this town must have been on crack.

2003-04-14T08:49:00.000-05:00

Odd Thoughts on MLB Week 2

The Royals finally lost last night, but how about that 9 -1 start. I'm still not convinced they're for real (the Indians started 9 -1 last year and finished in 3rd place). Baseball in Puerto Rico has been a huge success. The Expos must think it's great to see a full stadium cheering them on. On top of that, they managed to sweep the Mets and still lead their division. Rafael Palmeiro inched a bit closer to 500. I think his current count is 494. Schilling, Johnson, Pedro - still winless. They'll come around though. In fact they'll probably still be among the Cy Young contenders. Finally, Forbes reported on MLB salaries and, no surprise, showewd the Yankess with the highest payroll in the game: $ 152,749,814. That's a record. They also set a record for the greatest margin between the highest and second highest payroll - 34 million (the Mets are second with about 117 million). The Yankees had a profit margin of 16.1 million, which was second. Who was the first? Seattle (23.3 million).

2003-04-14T08:36:00.000-05:00

Mariner Report

Another slow, frustrating 3 and 3 week. 2001 ruined me for the Mariners. Back in the summer of '01 I commented to Deacon Blues that it was great to wake up know your team going to win that day. I was watching the M's Friday game against the Rangers and the commentator said someting about a 2001 M's slogan that went, "Two outs - so what." After we lost three in a row in the middile of the week I felt like our opponents were saying, "No outs - so what." I'm trying hard not to despair after two weeks, but the 2001 and even the 2002 squad (18-6 in April) made you believe they were invincable during that first month and this year they haven't. One more tough week - A's at home, Angels on the road. The pitching hasn't been terrible, but the hitters are still yet to get going. Perhaps winning these last two in Texas will give the guys a morale boost. As for the A's series, we won't see Zito during the 4-game series, and that's something to be thankful for. After this week, we've got a week with Cleveland and Detroit - can you even wait?

Mariner of the Week: Jamie Moyer. Moyer, Edgar's ageless counterpart, went 1-0 in two starts giving up only 2 runs in 12 innings pitched. Honorable mentione to Bret Boone and his 2-homer game last night.

2003-04-11T15:22:00.000-05:00

Cuts of Steak

Short Loin: This is the most tender section of the cow, located toward the back of the cow's mid-section. Four of the five big-name steaks come from this section: strip, T-bone, porterhouse, tenderloin (filet). These steaks don't need marinade, A-1, or any significant seasoning to be fantastic. When I grill these cuts I only add salt, pepper and maybe just a touch of worcestshire sauce while the meat is over the fire.

Rib: This is the second most tender portion of the cow and is on the front end of the cow's mid-section. While it's not the most tender section, it is considered by many to be the most flavorful. There are two steak cuts from this section, the rib steak and my personal favorite and the fifth of the big five, the rib eye. Like the group of steaks in the short loin, these steaks don't need much outside help to be great.

Sirloin: Despite the descent down the tenderness chart, this is still a good part of the cow located on the back side of the short loin section. The two cuts from this section are the well-known top sirloin, and the tri-tip, which is more like brisket than steak. The top sirloin is really an excellent cut. It usually tender and doesn't need much help in the flavor department. The best part is it's usually about half the cost of the previously mentioned cuts. I like to have fancy steaks, but I'm not too good for some top sirloin.

Lower: The cuts from this section (lower, or belly, section) of the cow are tougher, but definitely have their place. The front part of the belly is the skirt steak, and the back is the flank steak. These cuts are commonly used for fajitas and stir-fry. I usually season these cuts heavily, not because of poor flavor but because the types of dishes I use them in calls for it.

The last two sections, Round (hip) and Chuck (shoulder) are much tougher cuts. I generally would not use them as a steak sitting beside a baked potato. The cuts from the round are the round itself, round eye, and round tip. The cuts from the Chuck are blade, top blade, mock tender, round eye, and shoulder. These cuts usually end up as ground beef, cube steak, and stew meat. Obviously their common uses tell you that these cuts need more seasoning and tenderization than the other cuts.

2003-04-09T15:30:00.000-05:00

Robbie and I took a little trip to Sheridan, AR yesterday. We went to get his tiller and several other yard implements from his in-laws. On the way we picked up a Thrifty Nickle. Robbie asked me to read adds of interest to him. The short of it is that he ended up buying a dog. A Black Lab: male, 9-weeks old. After an hour of effort, we decided on a name: Charter. Can you guess the four-fold meaning of Charter?

After we got the dog, we went into the Camden, AR Wal-Mart and got dog food and a bowl. Robbie also bought some doggie snacks called Pup-eroni. They looked like little beef sticks. We decided to give them a try ourselves. We each took a bite. It smelled beefy and bacony, and the intial taste was pleasant. After chewing for a moment though, we noticed that it was like a beef stick with saw dust in it. Then the liver flavor took over. We commented that we would be happy to have them if we were starving. Silence follwed for a few minutes, and the liver flavor lingered. Fortunately we had some Reese's Pieces to clense the palate. We didn't take another bite.

2003-04-08T16:19:00.000-05:00

Steak Grading Facts

Under the United States Department of Agriculture (USDA), inspectors oversee the processing of all meat to insure sanitation and safety is maintained. The USDA inspection process insures that the meat is safe and processed under sanitary conditions but does not insure the taste and tenderness, qualities that are also important to you in your meat purchasing. For taste and tenderness, the USDA established a voluntary grading system to standardize the ranking of quality of meats. Beef has the highest number of grades - 8, while only 3 of these grades are of interest to most consumers.

Most people have heard of the prime grade. This is the grade of beef that you see at steakhouse-type restaurants. The prime grade is awarded to a very small (less than 2%) and select amount of meat from cattle raised specifically for prime meat. Prime meat is tender with a high degree of marbling (small amounts of fat evenly distributed through the muscle), fine texture and well flavored. Prime beef is also dry-aged, a very expensive process. With prime meat being quite expensive and with limited availability, consumers rarely even see this grade of meat for sale.

The grade of beef just below prime is choice. Choice meat is much less frequently seen today as most supermarkets have shifted to select meat. Choice grade beef is well marbled and has good flavor and texture. Rather than being dry-aged, choice beef will be wet-aged, a less expensive method of aging that still results in the meat becoming more tender through aging.

Select grade beef has less marbling and less juiciness than prime or choice beef. This is the grade of meat that most supermarkets carry--sometimes even in their fancy meat service counter--so, pay careful attention to what you are buying. With less marbling, there is a greater risk of dryness, if the meat is overcooked. If you are careful with your cooking, you will end up with an average steak or roast.

All the other grades are less frequently seen and include in descending order: standard, commercial, utility, cutter, and canning. Most of the time, these grades end up in canned soups, dog food, and of course hot dogs. Sometimes you will see these other grades of meat in the supermarket. These grades will have no marbling and a coarser texture. They can be a good choice of meat, on a limited budget or for certain uses such as tenderized steaks and hamburger but should be value priced. As with everything, you get what you pay for.

2003-04-07T00:31:00.000-05:00

Mariner Report

Well, we went 3 and 3; not the kind of start I wanted, but we do have the toughest division in the game. The bats have been a bit too quit overall (although we did score 11 runs on Sunday). Unlike the last two years where the M's got off to a hot start, I think it will take a bit longer for them to get going this year. I wee can come out of the next two weeks with things pretty even in the west, the whole situation will get better. We'll finally get the joke-schedule the Yankees and Twins have had.

Mariner of the Week: Edgar Martinez. The ageless wonder hit .381 with 2 homers and 6 RBIs. This was the M's best, but we need some hotter streaks than this.

2003-04-07T00:22:00.000-05:00

Odd Thoughts on Baseball's 1st Week

We have one week of baseball under our belts, and I thought I'd make some short obeservations about a few things I've noticed.

Who can believe the Royals and Pirates? I don't think it will last for KC, but the Pirates are likely to be a real nuisance for the rest of the NL Central all year long. Jeter got injured. Who's surprised? Griffey got injured. Who's surprised? Who's surprised that the Red Sox bullpen has been a dismal failure? In the vein of the Royals and Pirates, what about Tampa Bay? Their record doesn't look great, but I doubt Boston or the Yanks will take them lightly for the rest of the year. I'm happy Sosa got number 500 and Clemens has only 5 more wins to get to 300. I hope he gets the chance to win #300 in Fenway. How about no wins for Johnson, Schilling, and Pedro in the first week? At least Pedro pitched well, though. And finally, although the 3rd game of the series got rained out today, how about the Astros sweeping the Cardinals in St. Louis this weekend?

2003-04-04T14:24:00.000-06:00

With that in mind, here's some news for all you P.G. Wodehouse fans out there. Overlook Press is now publishing a beautiful collection of Wodehouse works. They have twelve titles available and four more coming out this summer. These are not Penguin paperbacks; these are truly beautiful books. If you don't want them, feel free to buy them for me.

2003-04-04T14:15:00.000-06:00

This goes back to an old inside (but broad) joke. It's funny no matter what, but I thought folks like Jon would really appreciate this quote from P.G. Wodehouse. Bertie Wooster, refering to Jeeves said,

"He never fails. He wears a number fourteen hat, eats tons of fish, and and moves in a mysterious way his wonders to perform. See, here he comes, looking as intelligent as dammit."

— Bertie Wooster in The Mating Season

2003-04-01T23:14:00.000-06:00

I would really like to be able to put images on my page here, but I can't seem to get it to work. When I click "Upload File" and find the image I want to upload, I'm just not sure what to put in the "Path" blank. I have been putting "images" in that blank, but I just end up with the broken image "X" when I'm done. Am I doing something wrong?

2003-04-01T08:03:00.000-06:00

According to military analysts, an invasion of Iraq by U.S. forces could cost between $20 and $100 billion. The Pentagon announced that it would offset those costs by referring to the war as the "Verizon Wireless/Pizza Hut War Against Iraq."

—Tina Fey, Saturday Night Live's "Weekend Update"

2003-03-31T08:26:00.000-06:00

I was reading about this guy who has survived being struck by lightning six times. That's something, but who wants to hang out with that guy?

2003-03-28T11:12:00.000-06:00

A New Cyber-Talk Abbreviation

I often find myself reading other people's blogs and finding something really funny. I want to comment but I don't know what to say. I usually don't have an applicable joke to trump it or even go along with it. But just writing "ha, ha" seems silly, so here's my new abbreviation for when I find myself in that situation: NCBAAF. It stands for No Comment But Acknowledged As Funny. So if you see that in your comment box, you'll know what it means.

2003-03-28T11:05:00.000-06:00

American League West Season Preview

Predicted order of finish: 1) Seattle Mariners, 2) Oakland A's, 3) Anaheim Angels, 4) Texas Rangers

The toughest division in the game is better, and it should still be a fight to the finish and have two teams playing in October for the 4th consecutive year. The Rangers are the best last-place team in the game. The Angels were fun to watch last year and look like a good team again. They caught lightning in a bottle last year, but it won't happen again. The A's are still good, but the economics of MLB will make this year their last shot for a while, and they might not even get that. The Mariners are the deepest all-around team in the game. They may not be able to handle the A's pitching should they meet in the ALCS, but the AL West will be represented in the World Series.

2003-03-28T10:58:00.000-06:00

Oakland Athletics Season Preview

I had normal-size preview all typed and one of those computer catastrophes happened and I lost it. Here's basically what I said: GM Billy Beane is a genius. Their rotation is the best in the game. Their bullpen has serious concerns. After Tejada and Chavez, the line up is lackluster at best. Unless the A's are on top of the division, Tejada will be gone by the trading deadline. It's sad that the economics of baseball forced the A's to lose Giambi and wll now force them to part with Tejada. Chavez, Zito, Hudson, and Mulder will all be gone in the next three years. Overall, the rotation is good enough to keep their playoff hopes alive, but another first-round exit is likely.

Line Up: 2B Mark Ellis, 1B Scott Hatteberg, SS Miguel Tejada, 3B Eric Chavez, RF Jermaine Dye, DH Erubiel Durazo, LF Terrence Long, CF Eric Byrnes, C Ramon Hernandez Rotation: LH Barry Zito, RH Tim Hudson, LH Mark Mulder, LH Ted Lilly, LH John Halama Closer: Keith Foulke

2003-03-28T10:20:00.000-06:00

Seattle Mariners Season Preview

I'm going out on a limb, here. I'm going to disagree with most (but not all) the baseball world and predict the Mariners to be in the World Series this year. Every aspect of the team should be better this year. Freddy Garcia will finally establish himself as a true ace, not in the Randy Johnson way, but winning 20 games and being in the top 5 in AL ERA is a perfectly reasonable guess. Jamie Moyer just won't quit. At age 40 he just keeps rolling along. His stuff isn't over-powering, but he consistently gets the job done. Joel Pineiro is ready to follow up a solid first season, and could become the best pitcher on the team. The rest of the rotation is filled with solid prospects. The bullpen is still the best in the game with Kazuhiro Sasaki getting set up by Arthur Rhodes (18-4 the last two years), Jeff Nelson, and Shigetoshi Hasegawa. The batting order lacks a true power hitter, but they do have four guys capable of 25+ in Edgar Martinez, John Olerud, Brett Boone, and Mike Cameron. The also have the best lead-off hitter in the game, Ichiro, who should have his best season yet. Another AL batting title is quite likely. Most of the group should hit over .300 as well. With Mar McLemore, John Mabry, and Greg Colbrun coming off the bench, the M's have a depth that is unmatched by any other team. Besides the Twins, they should also have the best defense in the game, with four gold glovers and the addition of Randy Winn. As with most teams, staying healthy will be a concern especially with Martinez and Moyer being in the 40 neighborhood. Perhaps the World Series may be a bold prediction, but I have little doubt the M's will be playing in October one way or another.

Line Up: RF Ichiro, LF Randy Winn, 2B Brett Boone, DH Edgar Martinez, 1B John Olerud, 3B Jeff Cirillo, CF Mike Cameron, C Ben Davis, SS Carlos Guillen Rotation: RH Freddy Garcia, LH Jamie Moyer, RH Joel Pineiro, RH Ryan Franklin, RH Gil Meche Closer: Kahuhiro Sasaki

2003-03-27T14:14:00.000-06:00

False Alarm

I didn't get my teeth out today. They said the dentist messed some stuff up and should have put me on antibiotics and scheduled a consult before they did the surgery. I'm still eventually going to have them out, but I won't reschedule until after the baby is born. I guess I'll be clear until June. Oh well, I guess I'll just have to have this 5-day weekend anyway.

2003-03-27T08:48:00.000-06:00

I'm getting my wisdom teeth out in about an hour. I haven't really been nervous about it, but I don't know what to expect either. I've heard some people who have gone back to work after they left the doctor's office, and others who said it was like having a baby through four places in your mouth. One friend had lots of pain medicine, but he got the hiccoughs for about four days and couldn't even sleep. Like, I said, I really don't know what to expect so this might be good bye for a few days.

2003-03-26T17:06:00.000-06:00

The Strangeness of the Times

Justice-seeking piano master Matthew Peacock sent this to me, and I thought it was really telling about the way things are.

You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the US of arrogance, and Germany doesn't want to go to war.

2003-03-25T15:49:00.000-06:00

Cars vs. Pedestrians

We often hear automobiles criticized. Safety experts say they're dangerous. Ecologists tell us they pollute the air. Economists claim cars are responsible for U.S. trade deficits and high energy costs. Social Scientists blame them for the deterioration of our inner cities. And aesthetes damn them for roadside blight. But even if all these accusations are true, the automobile is still an improvement on its principal alternative, the pedestrian.

Pedestrians are easily damaged. Try this test: Hit a pedestrian with a car. Now have the pedestrian hit the car back. Then roll a pedestrian and a car through four inches of slush and road salt at 60 mph. Take a coin-operated spray gun and hose off their undersides. Which is in better shape? Also most cars have 5 mph bumpers. A pedestrian can't be run into a wall at even 3 mph (average walking speed) without getting a bloddy nose. And pedestrians are notoriously expensive to repair.

Automobiles are cleaner than pedestrians. Even diesel exhaust smells better than dirty human. Pedestrians wiggle and squeal when you try to scrub them, and they are hard to wax. A dented and rusty automobile is still more attractive than the average pedestrian. Strip a car of its paint. Strip a person of its clothes. Which looks worse in broad daylight?

Cars last 100,000 miles or so. Just try to take a pedestrian that far.

P.J. O'Rourke, Give War a Chance

2003-03-25T15:36:00.000-06:00

National League Central Preview

Predicted order of finish: 1) Houston Astros, 2) St. Louis Cardinals, 3) Chicago Cubs, 4) Cinncinati Reds, 5) Pittsburgh Pirates, 6) Milwaukee Brewers

Like the rest of the National League, expect more of the same from the central this year. The Brewers are bad - there's really nothing more to say. The Pirates are improving and the rebuilding process is coming along, but Brian Giles deserves better. The Reds will benefit from a healthy Ken Griffey. If they had pitching, they could contend. The Cubs just aren't in the same class as the Cardinals and Astros. The Cardinals are fantastic, but they'll be settling for the wild card while the Astros win the division.

2003-03-25T15:30:00.000-06:00

Chicago Cubs Season Preview

I'm previewing the Cubs to be nice. I really don't think they have a chance of beating the Astros and Cardinals, but they're improved, they have a new manager who's a proven winner, and, really, how long can they underachieve? They do have Sammy Sosa who's one homer away from 500 career. Moises Alou seems to do well in odd numbered years. Mark Bellhorn and Corey Patterson have huge upsides after strong rookie years. They even added cathcer Damian Miller, which is a huge improvement over the enigmatic Todd Hundley. They also have the best strike-out trio available on the mound today - Kerry Wood, Mark Prior, and Matt Clement. They could be great, but Wood is a perpetual injury risk, Prior has only half a season of experience, and Clement is streaky at best. They did add Shawn Estes, who has pitched well for Dusty Baker in the past. Closer Antonion Alfonseca will start the season on the diabled list. Mike Remlinger and Kyle Farnsworth will get the extra saves.It will take magic for this team to be playing in October, but the Angels did it, so why can't the Cubs?

Line Up: 2B Mark Grubzielanek, SS Alex Gonzalez, RF Sammy Sosa, LF Moises Alou, 3B Mark Bellhorn, C Damian Miller, CF Corey Patterson, 1B Hee Seop Choi Rotation: RH Kerry Wood, RH Mark Prior, RH Matt Clement, RH Carlos Zambrano, RH Alan Benes Closer: RH Antonio Alfonseca

2003-03-25T15:02:00.000-06:00

St. Louis Cardinals Season Preview

The Cards look good again, and many baseball experts are picking them to represent the NL in the World Series. Their offense is still amoung the best in the game, anchored by Albert Pujols who finished second (to Barry Bonds) in NL MVP last year. He should have a career year in 2003. The Cards will also benefit from having Scott Rolen for a full year. It's scarry to think what he will do now that he's happy. Add that to the ver consistent and defensively brilliant Jim Edmonds and the Cards have one of the best 3-4-5 hitters in the league. The also have Edgar Renteria, who seems to be coming into his own and has overtaken Barry Larkin as the best NL shortstop. He should be an All-Star for years to come. The offense is not without it's questions though. Can J.D. Drew stay healthy and become the player the scouts think he can be? Will Eli Marrero get enough at bats to be as valuable as he can be? Will we see 2001 versions of Tino Martinez and Fernando Vina or 2002 versions (they're hoping for the 2001 version)? Matt Morris is a stud. He will be the ace of the staff and again among league leaders in wins. Woddy Williams could be a wonderful compliment to Morris if he can stay healthy. After those two, the rotation is a big problem area. Their options boil down to a bunch of re-tread veterans and young guys who have had great moments but injury problems later. I can't ven guess who will fill out the rest of the staff. Closer Jason Isringhausen is likely to start the season on the disabled list; my guess is that Jeff Fassero will get the early save opportunities. St. Louis could win this division, but a wild card spot seems more likely to me.

Line Up: 2B Fernando Vina, SS Edgar Renteria, CF Jim Edmonds, RF Albert Pujols, 3B Scott Rolen, LF J.D. Drew, 1B Tino Martinez, C Mike Matheny Rotation: RH Matt Morris, RH Woody Williams, RH Jason Simontacchi, RH Garrett Stephenson, RH Dustin Hermanson Closer: RH Jason Isringhausen

2003-03-25T14:42:00.000-06:00

Houston Astros Season Preview

The Astros look great. This is a team that has been near or at the top of their division since realignment in 1994. Yet they have not even won a playoff game. But rest assured ye Astros faithful - this is the year they go to the World Series. I usually leave my predictions to the division winners without making playoff predictions, but I really feel this will be the year for the Astros to be one of the last two teams standing. Pitching injuries and and early season offensive slump kept Houston from achieving their potential last year, but this year they'll be hitting on all cylinders. The offense didn't need any help, but they got it anyway, landing the second most prominent free agent of the year, Jeff Kent (Jim Thome was #1). Kent, the 2000 NL MVP, has six straight 100 RBI seasons and has preformed well whether he batted before or after Bonds. On top of those offensive feats, he's moving from Pac-Bell Park, a pitcher's haven, to Minute Maid Park, a hitter's paradise. I look for Kent to have a career year batting somewhere either before, between, or after the other two Asrtos studs, Jeff Bagwell (who's completely healthy) and Lance Berkman, who seems to be a consistently healthy version of Larry Walker. I also expect Craig Biggio and Richard Hidalgo to bounce back from a two-year decline. Add that to gold glove catcher Brad Ausmus and promising youngsters Julio Lugo and Morgan Ensberg and one could argue the Astros have the best offense in the National League. They also have the best young pair of pitchers in the league with Roy Oswalt and Wade Miller. The pair has gone a combined 64 and 24 the past two years. They may combine for 40 wins this year. Oswalt is the next big thing. If you've been wondering who will carry the torch as the greatest NL pitcher when Randy Johnson is gone, look no further. Shane Reynolds will be a strong number three after returning from back surgery last year. Houston also has a strong bulpen with fire-balling lefty Billy Wagner and perhaps the best middle reliever in the game Octavio Dotel. The Astros should walk all over the NL all season long.

Line Up: SS Julio Lugo, CF Craig Biggio, 1B Jeff Bagwell, LF Lance Berkman, 2B Jeff Kent, RF Richard Hidalgo, 3B Morgan Ensberg, C Brad Ausmus Rotation: RH Roy Oswalt, RH Wade Miller, RH Shane Reynolds, RH Tim Redding, RH Kirk Saarloos Closer: LH Billy Wagner

Up Next: AL West Preview

2003-03-23T00:30:00.000-06:00

LOL

I don't know if this circle of folks has already covered this, but I hate things like LOL, BTW and such. The part I hate most is that LOL is needed sometimes. For instance, I recently had a cyber exchange with my good buddy Deacon Blues in which I refered to him as a tool. He then sent me an e-mail that could have easily been interpreted as unfriendly. I replied to the message with an apology. All of this probably could have been avoided with a simple LOL. I wish there was another way to compensate for the lack of facial expressions in cyber chats besides cheesy abbreviations or variations of ":)". It's just so difficult to emote in text without being silly. Please don't stop using the LOL - I understand. We still need it. But there's got to be a better way.

I was very happy that I got to use the word "emote" in the above paragraph. If I could only find a way to squeeze in "uvula" I'd be set.

2003-03-20T11:27:00.000-06:00

24-Hour News

I've watched a lot of news on the war already. It seems lame to hear the same thing over and over, but I do appreciate being able to get caught up on the news at any time of day. What I can't take is the little strip of headlines running on the bottom of the screen. Most of the things they say are trite and out of context. President Bush said we will accept no outcome but victory. In reply to that, Robbie pointed out that it's pretty hard to deny defeat, regardless of what you're willing to accept. I have observed a few interesting things though. For instance, Dan Rather favorably quoted Stonewall Jackson last night. I have also learned that it's possible to take six minutes of news and cram it into two hours.

2003-03-20T10:58:00.000-06:00

National League East Preview

Predicted order of finish: 1) Atlanta Braves, 2) Philadelphia Phillies, 3) New York Mets, 4) Florida Marlins, 5) Montreal Expos

Every team in this division is improved, except the Expos. The Expos should be fun to watch, especially in the tiny stadium they'll play at in Puerto Rico. Manager Frank Robinson gets a lot out of his guys, and the Expos will be better than we expect, although not better enough to get out of 5th place. The Marlins have decided to go with the speed game rather than the power game, adding Juan Pierre, and losing Preston Wilson. They also added Ivan Rodriguez who appears to be in great shape. The Mets will be better, the Phillies will be much better, and Braves will win this division again.

2003-03-20T10:52:00.000-06:00

New York Mets Season Preview

The Mets had to be the most dissapointing team last year. Every body stank. They did add Tom Glavine and Cliff Floyd to an already impressive list of names. Glavine adds some legitimacy to the Mets' rotation, leading Al Leiter and Pedro Astacio. Armando Benitez will put up good fantasy numbers, but he's yet to prove he can close out the big game. Lefty John Franco could be back by mid-season - he's two games short of 1,000 career appearances. (Franco would have my vote for the Hall of Fame.) They also have Dave Weathers in the pen, who is one of the premier middle relievers in the game. Cliff Floyd should continue to produce as he has in 2001 and 2002. At least some of the other players will have to rebound. I just can't see that many guys putting up career worst seasons again in 2003. Mike Piazza, Roberto Alomar, Mo Vaughn, Roger Cedeno, and Jeromy Burnitz should return to some level of their old selves. All of them have probably had their career seasons, but I expect some degree of rebound from all of them. Journeyman utility infielder Rey Sanchez will likely get the nod at short stop, but he's just keeping it warm for 19-year-old minor league player of the year Jose Reyes. Reyes will be the starter by the end of the year. Overall the Mets lokk better, butit won't be enough to outdo the Phillies and Braves. I think the Met's need to some minor rebuilding, and they're in a position to do it without the pain that usually goes with such a project.

Line Up: CF Roger Cedeno, 2B Roberto Alomar, LF Cliff Floyd, C Mike Piazza, 1B Mo Vaughn, RF Jeromy Burnitz, 3B Ty Wigginton, SS Rey Sanchez Rotation: LH Tom Glavine, LH Al Leiter, RH Pedro Astacio, RH Steve Trachsel, LH Mike Bacsik Closer: RH Armando Benitez

2003-03-20T10:38:00.000-06:00

Philadelphia Phillies Season Preview

The Phillies are the most improved team in the game. The added an ace pitcher, Kevin Millwood, a very solid third baseman, David Bell, and the jewel of the free agent market, firts baseman Jim Thome. Millwood leads a group of promising young arms with veteran Randy Wolf, and youngsters Vincente Padilla, Brandon Duckworth, and Brett Myers. The Philadelphia brass considers Myers to be the ace of the future. Jose Mesa is usually considered to be a questionable closer, but he always seems to get the job done, saving 45 games last year. They also have left-handed legend Dan Pleasac who at age 41proves that left-handed pitching doesn't die, it just finds a situational job in the bullpen. Although the Phillies parted ways with Scott Rolen last year, adding Bell and Thome is a big improvement. Bell plays solid defense, should be good for 20 homers and 80 RBIs and tends to come up big in the clutch. People have complained about his skills, but as a Mariner fan, I'd be ecstatic to have him back. Thome is a stud - defenitely in the conversation of best first basemen in the game. He hit 52 home runs for Cleveland last year with absolutely no line up protection. This year he'll have Pat Burrell and Bobby Abreu, both of which haven't begun to show us what they can do. Catcher Mike Lieberthal probably will never return to the 30-homer level, but in this line up, a repeat of the 15 he hit last year will be more than sufficient. Thus far the line up looks strong, but there are some questions. Can Jimmy Rollins break his sophmore jinx and return to 2001 form? Is Marlon Byrd ready to be an every-day major leaguer? Who will play second base? Right now it seems that utility man Placido Polanco will play second, but I think the Phils would be better off if they could use him off the bench. I still think the Braves will win this division, but the Phils could win the wild card is, and would not be completely floored should they beat the Braves for the division title.

Line Up: SS Jimmy Rollins, 2B Placido Polanco, RF Bobby Abreu, 1B Jim Thome, LF Pat Burrell, C Mike Lieberthal, 3B David Bell, CF Marlon Byrd Rotation: RH Kevin Millwood, LH Randy Wolf, RH Vincente Padilla, RH Brandon Duckworth, RH Brett Myers Closer: RH Jose Mesa

2003-03-20T10:20:00.000-06:00

Atlanta Braves Season Preview

A lot of people seem concerned about the Braves winning the East again, but not me. Until the Braves are dethroned, I'll continue to believe in them. Although thy lost Tom Glavine and Kevin Millwood, their pitching stafff may be even better. They added Russ Ortiz, Paul Byrd, and Mike Hampton. Hampton should return to his 20-win days after getting out of Colorado. Byrd is a an up-and-comer, and Ortiz had a good season and pitched well for the Giants in the postseason. On top of these three, Greg Maddux returns, just 27 wins short of 300 career. He won't get there this year, but should in 2004. Maddux will again be among league leaders in wins and ERA. The offense should be stronger too, as the team is expecting rebounds from Andruw Jones, Gary Sheffield, and Chipper Jones. There's no way those three guys will all have down years again. Reports say Javy Lopez looks better than ever. The middle infield of Rafael Furcal and Marcus Giles is expected to do big things. They also added Detroit's lone 2002 All-Star, Robert Fick. Fick is not a front line firts baseman, but he should be a significant improvement over the Julio Franco/Wes Helms platoon. Finally, John Smoltz should again be the best closer in the NL. He led the majors in saves (55), and with the exception of one bad outing in the early part of last year, was a lights-out closer. The Phillies and Mets look good, but I don't think they'll break the Braves' strangle hold on the division.

Line Up: SS Rafael Furcal, 1B Robert Fick, LF Chipper Jones, RF Gary Sheffield, CF Andruw Jones, C Javy Lopez, 3B Vinny Castilla, 2B Marcus Giles Rotation: RH Greg Maddux, LH Mike Hampton, RH Russ Ortiz, RH Paul Byrd, RH Jason Marquis Closer: RH John Smoltz

On Deck: NL Central Season Preview

2003-03-19T09:11:00.000-06:00

Like Duane, I'm dying for the baseball season to start. Bud Selig announced yesterday that the Mariners vs. A's series in Japan will be cancelled due to the threat of war and the risk of flying overseas. I don't know if I would have stayed up for 2:00 AM start time on Tuesday to watch it, but I was happy baseball was starting a week earlier. Oh well, at least I saw Baseball Tonight last night.

2003-03-19T08:55:00.000-06:00

Odd Thoughts

No Slums Behind Them Pearly Gates

My good friend Roger Carter forwarded this article to me. This is an actual article from Monroe Louisiana's own daily paper, The News Star:

I wanted to verify this so I did a search through google and found that both CNN and ABC have reported this story too.

Odd Thoughts on the Billboard Charts

Mariner Report

Hall of Fame

Name Game

Mariner Report

MLB Report

Shasta: 9/1/89 - 7/10/03

Our Outrageous Government Strikes Again

Out of the Loop

Mariner Report

MLB Report

Praise God for his Promises to Us

Our Household has Increased by One

Mariner Report

Mariner of the Week: I have to go with Freddy Garcia this week. Garcia would have won 2 games this week had Rhodes not blown the game in the 9th. Freddy went 1-0 in 2 starts, with 12.2 innings and a 2.84 ERA.

MLB Report

Google Yourself

AL All-Stars

I'm not really one to blog about the weather, but sheesh it's hot. The official West Monroe temperature is 103 with a heat index of 112. It's killing me. It's so hot the humidity is actually going down.

Mariner Report

MLB Report

Finally

I was just ecstatic when I read this report from USA Today. Now maybe we can get both sides of the news.

There Is Such a Thing as a Respectable Yankee

Larry Doby, 1923-2003

Mariner Report

MLB Report

This was how Sophie felt this afternoon when she read this on ESPN.com:

Does Edgar Martinez belong in the Hall of Fame?

Now that you've read what Rob said, I'm sure you feel the same way Sophie did. And really, who wouldn't?

You may have already seen this on A minor, but my sister-in-law Shannon now has her very own blog. Even though Jon stole my thunder and violated my own personal (and completely unspoken) outing policy, I give you . . . a peck of gold.

Mariner Report

MLB Report

Mariner Report

MLB Update

Goodbye, David Cone

Dad sent me this link to the dullest blog in the world.

We're Home

Amy and Sophie came home from the hospital Friday afternoon. We're both elated to be home and to have another person sharing our house. Now that she's here, that makes Deacon Blues the next father-to-be in our little blogging world. Remy is in the hole.

Mariner Report

Mariner of the Week: Carlos Guillen is a no-brainer this week. So far he's a great answer for the #2 slot in the order between Ichiro and Boone. Last week he went 9 for 20 (.450) with 5 runs scored.

MLB Update

I realized after posting that announcement that I did not include her name: Sophie Adelaide Booth. Thanks to everyone for their thoughts, prayers, and congratulations. Here's another picture.

Here She Is

She was born at 4:55 PM Wednesday the 21st. She weighed 7 lb. 2 oz. and measured 20.25 inches. Mother and Baby are doing very well.

Mariner Report

Odd Thoughts on MLB Week 7

Survivor

Vitamins

Mariner Report

Mariner of the Week: This is a tough call. Edgar had 3 homers, Ichiro had 10 hits, but I think I have to go with Jamie Moyer. This is Moyer's second MOW (Mariner of the Week) this year. Moyer's stats this week: 2 Wins, 12 Innings, 8 K's, 3.00 ERA.

Odd Thoughts on MLB Week 6

The due date is almost past, and the baby has not come yet. I went to the docter with Amy today and we got to see the baby again.

In case this picture looks like nothing more than a black and white blob to you - that small black circle in the top-center is her right eye.

Mother's Poem

With Mother's Day approaching, I thought I'd share another Garrison Keillor poem.

Some mornings I get up at five.With four to mother, one to wive,I find the hours from light to darkAre not enough to matriarchWith goals for matriarchy highAmong the apples of my eye.

Negligence in the name of loveIs just what we should have more of.Don't mother birds after some weeksOf looking at those upturned beaksDeliberately the food delay,Hoping to hear their goslings say,"What are these feathered floppy thingsAttached to us? You think they're wings?"

Stella Awards

The Stella Awards are given by an independent group that recognizes successful lawsuits that are beyond frivolous. Stella was the name of the woman who sued McDonald's when she spilled hot coffee and burned herself. Here are a few from 2002 that I thought were worth sharing:

A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber Carson of Lancaster, Pennsylvania, $113,500 after she slipped on a soft drink spill and broke her tailbone. The beverage was on the floor because Ms. Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an argument.

Pregnancy Update - Week 40

Mariner Report

Mariner of the Week: Deacon Blues lobbied for Mike Cameron who went 8 for 18 with 2 homers and 9 RBIs, but I have to go with Gil Meche. Meche went 2 and 0 including 7.2 scoreless innings against the Yankees. His totals for the week: 2 wins, 7 Ks, 0.71 ERA in 12.2 innings.

Odd Thoughts on MLB Week 5

Grover Cleveland Alexander is the only Major League Baseball player to be named after an American president and to be portrayed by a future American president in a movie (played by Ronald Reagan in The Winning Team, 1952).

Thank Goodness We Can Always Find Divers

Mariner Report

Mariner of the Week: John Olerud. The Mariner's Mr. Consistent hit .391 with an insane .520 on base percentage. He also scored 5 runs and drove in 6. All this along with his always stellar defense.

Odd Thoughts on MLB Week 4

The Solo Sock

Of life’s many troubles, I’ve known quite a few: Bad plumbing and earaches and troubles with you, But the saddest of all, when it’s all said and done, Is to look for your socks and find only one. Here’s a series of single socks stacked in a row. Where in the world did their fellow socks go?

About missing socks, we have very few facts. Some say cats steal them to use for backpacks, Or desperate Norwegians willing to risk Prison to steal socks to make lutefisk. But the robbery theories just don’t hold water: Why would they take one and not take the odder?

Now, some people lose socks, and though you may scoff, Some go to shows and have their socks knocked off. Some use a sock to mop up spilled gin with And some people had just one sock to begin with. But for most missing socks, or sock migration, Sockologists have no quick explanation.

If you wake in the night and hear creaking and scraping, It’s the sound of a sock, bent on escaping. The socks on the floor that you think the kids dropped? They’re socks that went halfway, got tired, and stopped.

Some mornings I get up at five.
With four to mother, one to wive,
I find the hours from light to dark
Are not enough to matriarch
With goals for matriarchy high
Among the apples of my eye.

Negligence in the name of love
Is just what we should have more of.
Don't mother birds after some weeks
Of looking at those upturned beaks
Deliberately the food delay,
Hoping to hear their goslings say,
"What are these feathered floppy things
Attached to us? You think they're wings?"

Of life’s many troubles, I’ve known quite a few:
Bad plumbing and earaches and troubles with you,
But the saddest of all, when it’s all said and done,
Is to look for your socks and find only one.
Here’s a series of single socks stacked in a row.
Where in the world did their fellow socks go?

About missing socks, we have very few facts.
Some say cats steal them to use for backpacks,
Or desperate Norwegians willing to risk
Prison to steal socks to make lutefisk.
But the robbery theories just don’t hold water:
Why would they take one and not take the odder?

Now, some people lose socks, and though you may scoff,
Some go to shows and have their socks knocked off.
Some use a sock to mop up spilled gin with
And some people had just one sock to begin with.
But for most missing socks, or sock migration,
Sockologists have no quick explanation.

If you wake in the night and hear creaking and scraping,
It’s the sound of a sock, bent on escaping.
The socks on the floor that you think the kids dropped?
They’re socks that went halfway, got tired, and stopped.